How to start a diary (and keep it going)

Starting a diary takes about two minutes. Keeping it going is the hard part. This guide covers both: how to set one up, what to write when the page is blank, and how to come back after you've skipped a week (you will, and that's fine).

Why keep a diary at all?

People start diaries for different reasons. Some want a record of their life, so the ordinary days don't vanish. Some want a place to think through a decision, a breakup or a new job. Some just want somewhere to put the noise in their head so they can sleep. You don't need a big reason. "I want to remember this year" is enough.

It helps to know your reason, though, because it shapes everything else: how often you write, how long your entries are, and whether anyone else should read them.

Step 1: Decide who it's for

Before you write a word, decide whether your diary is just for you or whether you'd like other people to read it. This matters more than it sounds. If you suspect someone might read it, you'll start editing yourself, and a diary you edit for an audience stops being useful as a place to be honest.

Private: only you can read it, after you log in. Best for honest, messy, everyday writing.
Public: anyone can read it. Good if you like the idea of readers, feedback, or writing practice.
Mixed: a subscription setting. Either private unless you share an entry, or public unless you keep an entry to yourself.

On my-diary.org a new diary is private. You can switch the whole diary to public later, and you can switch it back to private. Setting it back to private hides it: a page is public only when both the diary and that entry are public. If you're unsure, start private.

Step 2: Pick where you'll write

Paper and online diaries both work. The best one is the one you'll actually open.

A paper notebook is pleasant, offline and has no distractions. It's also easy for someone to find, and it can be lost, soaked or thrown out by accident.
An online diary is with you on your phone and your computer, is password-protected, can be searched, and doesn't disappear if you lose a bag.

If you go online, look for three things: it should be private by default, it should be easy to get your writing out again, and it shouldn't bury your words in features. my-diary.org has been doing exactly that, free, since 2000, so it's a reasonable place to start.

Step 3: Write your first entry

The first entry is where most people stall, because it feels like it should be important. It doesn't need to be. Here are a few easy ways in:

Today, plainly. What did you do, who did you see, what did you eat? Boring details become the most interesting part when you reread them years later.
Where you are right now. Your age, where you live, what you do all day, what's on your mind. A snapshot of your life as it is.
Why you're starting. One paragraph on what made you open a diary today.
One thing that's bothering you. Write it down as if you were telling a friend who won't judge.

Don't worry about spelling, grammar or sounding clever. Nobody is grading it. Five honest sentences beat a page of trying too hard.

How to write a diary entry

There's no correct format, but a loose structure helps when you're tired or stuck. Try this:

Date and a line about the day. "Tuesday. Rained all day, train was late."
What happened. The main event, even if it was small.
How you felt about it. This is the part people skip, and the part you'll most want to read later.
One thing to remember or do next. Optional, but it gives the next entry somewhere to start.

Here's a short example:

Thursday. Finally told my manager I want to move teams. Rehearsed it for days and it took four minutes. She said she'd think about it. I felt sick beforehand and weirdly light afterwards. I keep waiting to regret it and I don't. Next: stop checking my email every ten minutes waiting for her answer.

That's about seventy words. It took a few minutes, and a year from now it will tell you exactly what that week felt like.

Step 4: Make it a habit

Most diaries die in the second or third week, not because people run out of things to say, but because writing hasn't found a place in their day yet. A few things help:

Attach it to something you already do. After your morning coffee, on the bus home, or right before bed. A fixed moment works better than "whenever I have time".
Make it small. Aim for three sentences. If you write more, great. A low bar is easy to clear on a bad day.
Keep it close. If your diary is on your phone, you can write in the queue at the shop. Fewer steps means more entries.
Use a reminder. A phone alarm at the same time each day is often all it takes. On my-diary.org you can also set a reminder interval under Account, and you'll get an email if you haven't written for a while.
Don't aim for every day. A few times a week is a perfectly good diary. Daily is a bonus, not the rule.

What to write when you don't know what to write

Blank-page days happen. Keep a few prompts ready:

What was the best and worst part of today?
What am I avoiding right now, and why?
What did someone say today that stuck with me?
What am I looking forward to this week?
What would I tell myself from a year ago?
What's something small I'm grateful for today?
What did I change my mind about recently?
If today were a chapter title, what would it be?

You can also just list things: what you ate, songs you played, people you talked to. Lists count, and they often turn into proper entries halfway through.

When you miss a few days (or a few months)

You'll skip days. Everyone does. The mistake is thinking you have to catch up on everything you missed before you're allowed to write again. You don't. Write one line, "Haven't written in three weeks, a lot happened, here's today," and carry on from there.

Gaps are part of the record too. Sometimes the weeks you didn't write tell you something about what was going on.

Keeping your diary private and safe

If your diary is honest, it's worth protecting:

Use a password you don't use anywhere else.
Log out on shared computers.
Be careful with full names, addresses and other people's private details, especially in public entries.
If you keep a paper diary, think about where it lives.

Rereading what you wrote

One of the best parts of keeping a diary comes later. Every so often, read back a month or a year. You'll notice patterns: the same worries coming back, things that felt huge and turned out fine, progress you didn't notice while it was happening. Don't edit old entries. Leave them as they were. That's the point.

Ready to start?

You don't need the perfect notebook, the perfect app or the perfect first sentence. Pick a moment today, write three honest lines, and come back tomorrow.

If you'd like to write online, my-diary.org is free, private by default, and you can make your diary public whenever you want. People have been writing their diaries here since 2000. Create your free diary and write your first entry today.