Nellie

fucked up
2002-01-17 06:00:31 (UTC)

reply

I was reading someone elses diary on here. this person
finally got caught not bein fine. She was starving
herself. She had mentioned that her parents knew
everything and that maybe she should ask them why she cut
herself. this is what i said: "as soon as you figure out
why you cut yourself tell me. Maybe that will have
something to do with why i do it. I understand how you
feel about the damn family thing. My whole
fucking....well...everyone thought that i was just fine.
I was cutting myself and doing anything to let people know
that i wasn't. Yet at the same time i was hiding it. I
wanted to be just fine. Subconsiously i guess i wanted
them to know. I just wanted to be perfect again. Not
look wise by any means. I just wanted to fucking be
normal. Be ok. Then i got suicidal. To make a long
story short, im sorry. I am so sorry that no one listnes
when we yell out. I wish i could help somehow. If you
want to talk to me sometime, my aim name is
NellieGoddess. Nellie is my name on here also. IF you
feel like reading my bull shit story's then feel free. IF
not i totally understand. " I have a tendency to write
way to much. basicly all i wanted to say is i understand
and im sorry. if you ever want to talk i'm open. well
maybe thats one of my subconsious ways to not let anyone
close. Just anoy the hell out of them. DAmn im good at
that.