Life, no one gets out alive?
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2002-01-15 21:22:22 (UTC)

I know

I know I never finished updating about new year's but right
now I don't feel the need as everything has seemed to work
out. I've been keeping myself as busy as possible with
friends, work, and anything else that may amuse me. But it
isn't doing a good job as I am BORED!!! O-well life sucks
then you die. I jsut want to go back to school. This is
sad I don't think I have ever WANTED to go back to schoo,
but the truth is I actually like learneing when it is
presented in such a way thatI am not treated as though I am
two. *Scars from public school education becoming a little
more visible with the insight of true education.* O-well. I
want to learn fasted I don't feel as though I am intaking
enough information. I don't know what it is the only way I
can describe it is that I am a P4 processor and everyone
else is sending me information at the P3 or celeron level
(or maybe I should have used a modem analogy o-well)*can you
tell I am a computer fuck up?*. I just feel hungry for more.

On another note I feel happier I guess, still alone, but
happy. Then again as I write that I doubt myself. I think
I jsut need to get my feelings out to one of my best
friends (whom I also have more than jsut friendship
feelings for). I have loved him as a friend but I have
always loved him as more, whether we see eachother on a
regular basis or not he is an integral part of my life and
with out him I would be less of a person. I jsut don't
know life is just constant transition and I would like it
to just be stationary for just a bit, even though I know
that may never happen.

Alrighty I'm starting to feel as though I am Babling again
so I'm going to stop typing now. Night all.

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