acidhouse420

420 Log
2002-01-15 15:04:10 (UTC)

Reader Discretion is Advised

It is currently 8:56am on Tuesday morning. This journal
entry is inappropriate for the immature.

Last night, was going fine. It seems we never get through
a night without fighting, but last night...was going good.
It was good when I got home and had the apt. to myself for
a few hours. It was good when he came home and we ate. It
was good when we went out for a walk to Safeway. It was
good when we came home and had a shower and made tea. It
was good...

...it was good until we went to bed. I love sex. I will
admit it. You could almost compare me to a teenage boy
with how often I think about it. Although, I wouldn't act
on it as much I don't think. There is only so much I can
take. Anyway, the point is, he is shy, and never really
was all that into sex, since none of his past gf's have
been much into it. So, essentially, it's usually me who
wants to get anything going, and it's usually me that
suggests trying new things and the like. Last
night...things started hopping...and I was like, well,
let's go to bed early *wink wink*. And then we got to bed,
I rembember fooling around a bit...then I remember WAKING
UP. And him being really into it...and trying to go on
with things...and me going NO...and passing out again, and
him saying "Well, that's the last time I try to initiate
anything." *HUGE GIANT SIGH*

Now, I am fully, and completely aware that this is my
fault. The boy is already insecure enough as it is, I
probably just shattered everything by passing out on him.
I understand that. I feel terrible. I woke up this
morning and I hoped and prayed that I had dreamed it. But
I hadn't. And so I haven't spoken to him yet today, and I
want to tell him I'm sorry, eventhough I'm sure it won't
make awhole lot of a difference. Boo.

Anyway. Um. I'm at work...as usual...so I'm going to take
off and actually try to get something done.
You...YOU...take care.




Ad: