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2002-01-15 04:05:52 (UTC)


well its been quite a while since i last wrote and am
really unsure of what i last wrote.... my roomies finally
moved out and its much more pleasant here.... even the cats
seem happier.. scott and i have the house to ourselves and
oh yes we've been using it =-).... the apartment looks a
lot nicer and a lot less cluttered too... although it does
need to be cleaned... not as bad as it used to get
though... ive been kinda depressed lately though... besides
the fact that scott and i arent going to be celebrating our
year anniversary or our xmas this month either... oh well..
cant afford it.. dont know how we manage to pay bills and
feed ourselves as it is...

okay... me depressed.. nothing unusual... scott told me the
other day that he was thinking about moving home in may
when our lease is up here and going back to college... and
i dont know what got over me but i just started crying.. i
knew he wanted to go back but i thought it would be around
here and even though hes going to be only about an hour and
a half away thats a long ways to go especially when your
poor and moving into a new apartment... and he'll be busy
so i figure a couple times a month and on his breaks...
sadness it really felt like i was preparing and counting
when i had/have to say good bye.. and maybe for good.. he
says to keep the faith in us.. but come on.. its college
new people new things... maybe new g/f... or saying hey i
really want to start on a career and that means moving even
further to get a good job.. so i was just really sad and
now have been trying to find my fake happiness and trying
to be happy even though i feel like im loosing a best
friend and companion... i dont know .. thats pretty much
whats been going on with me... just hanging out with cassie
and kate... watching movies ... nothing too exciting...
anywhos.. just thought id write since its been a really
long time.. latz