still single

Okay well today I woke up..

Okay well today I woke up feeling a little bit better...
(and after reading other entries I almost feel sane)I took
Casey(my dog) to Dog Beach and laid out for a little
bit...Damn I'm getting fat...I've decided to start working
out immediately and on a daily basis until I lose some
serious weight...I can control that hopefully, not like the
hair pulling...

I almost wish I was doing meth again so I could lose the
weight quickly but that's just not feasible...besides it's
been so many years I'd be afraid to do it now...but I
looked so good when I was on it, believe it or not...I
weighed 105-110 which looked really good on me since I'm
short...I wish I was 21 again...I need to lose weight or I
will never meet anyone...I don't even want to date now
until I lose some poundage and/or grow some hair...too much
stress... too much trouble...I wish I could just move away
from here and start over...I am soo dreading going back to
work on Monday...I am over it...I can't take the stress
anymore.I just need to go back to school but I don't have
the money and I already owe 20k to my credit cards due to
my partying days, and I'm robbing Peter to pay Paul every
month pretty much...shit..ok I'm gonna take a nap now