2002-01-12 03:24:56 (UTC)

Ignored by my bestfriend

Yo- I thought a best friend is always supposed to be there
for you and not ignore you whenever you're wit people,
right?? Aren't they supposed to call you to do stuff over
the weekends or breaks or holidays? Aren't they supposed to
talk to you in school and not push you out of
conversations? HA that's a big joke because my "best
friend" is doing about the opposite to me. Past friends of
hers have talked to me about how they noticed a daily
change in her moods and attitude too because she always
switches from person to person from week to week, or even
day to day. She's one of the most unpredictable bitches
I've ever known, yet she's still my so-called best friend.
We've now been friends for 3 years, but she still doesn't
have as much respect for me as I have for her. I don't
believe in horoscopes, but I think mine is truely accurate
(Cancer) because it perfectly describes how I feel about my
friends. I'm always the sensitive, quiet, loving one who
nurtures them and never lets them down. I would never think
about leaving my best friend behind or making her feel bad,
yet she does that to me every day. Maybe I should begin to
do that in order to make her feel what I feel. Today at
lunch I almost cried because she walked into the cafeteria,
pushed me aside and gave Lauren a huge hug and grabbed her
hand and pulled her away from everyone else. She never once
said hello to me, or even acknowledged my presence. Last
year this went on with a different girl, but lasted only
for a few months. However, those were the worst few months
of last year. My biggest concern is that she's going to
move and I will be left with nobody..absolutely nobody. I
have other friends of course, but I'm not nearly as close
to them as I am with her. She doesn't even care about
moving, which proves how much she cares about me. Should I
back off and begin to get closer with my other friends or
confront her with my feelings? I'm tired of always having
to be the one to call her up and ask why she's acting all
pissed off at me for no reason, but I don't want to treat
her the same way she's treating me. Sometimes I really wish
I could just move and have my whole life start over at a
new and different school.

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