a watercolour stain
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2002-01-11 19:30:32 (UTC)

same shit different day....

well, we got into a fight last night. that's a real big
surprise. heh. we decided to order pizza and he insisted
that i had to call and order it. i didn't want to cause of
this sore throat and the fact that i sound like a frog. he
said if i didn't call, neither was he, so i was just going
to have to make something for dinner. i told him fuck you,
and so, he made himself a steak. i had a twinkie. how
absolutly depressing. hm, i've been in a letter writing
mood lately, so i sent out three letters today. to kimmie,
anne, and posie. ho hum. isaac got a call about a job
yesterday from gabe's. i'm hoping he gets it, and we move
back home. i hope it will make things better. who knows,
things might get worse. with me being near friends and
family and being able to go places. i'm wondering if we're
just eternally doomed. i'm not happy, and i don't think he
truly is either. i got into all of this with the glimmer
of hope that i could make things wonderful for myself, and
put all the shit behind me and never have to look back. he
promised me so much. in truth, i'm in the same prison,
just in a different cell. hmm, i read somewhere that 50%
of people who live together before they get married get a
divorce. not that i actually think it will ever make it
that far. i mean, i have this huge ring on my finger, and
the pattern for the 'perfect' wedding dress, but c'mon.
um, and i had a strange, erotic lesbian dream when i took a
nap today. i have been having the WEIRDEST dreams lately.
a parking garage, mcbride and dave naked on bikes, steak, a
peculiar party...the list goes on and on. perhaps i should
look them up.....~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

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