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2002-01-11 00:56:00 (UTC)

i find it hard to keep from laughing even when things can be so sad

my day shit is over.
i am now a happy but tired girl.

i went to school this morning.
then straight to work.
and now, i am finally home.

im not sure if im going out tonight or not..
i dont know if im too much in the mood for it.
jennifer wants to hang out.
and if she calls like she said that she would
i might see her.
i havent seen her in a long time.
but...i dont know.
robin just called me.
shes cute.
she invited me to join her and chaz for coffee and open mic
night at the all new gay coffee shop semi downtown
i dont know if im up for it.
young once right.
its just nothing feels like too exciting right now.
i dont know.
not what my choice of things to do would be.
sleeping is high on that list.
but i cant let myself go to sleep this early or i know full
well ill wake up in the middle of the night and not be able
to get back to sleep.
horrible cycle yes indeedy
but anyway

i wrote emily a note today.
horray for note again time

bits n pieces

im sorry about waking you up in a bad way this morning. i
didnt want to. youve been so great recently. not that you
werent before, but you know what i mean. and i feel like im
not giving you enough credit for that. like...im never
happy. or as if thats how you see it. and, im sorry for
that. the not calling me thing upsets me yes. of course.
but in prospective, its not that huge of a problem. and,
you should be proud of the good things youve been doing.
and not dwelling on the little bad things.
which, i feel-is my fault.
and im going to try not to do that anymore.

this cute black guy with braids is willing wheel of fortune.
hes being very adorable.

just talking to jennifer and to robin.

were going to the coffee thing tonight..
but its not open mic night.
robin was wrong and cute.
awwww black boy just won 25000 $
adorableness yes.
a lot.

i miss emily.
i can not wait to see her tomorrow.

chicken wings are yummy.

this place closes around 10 i think so i should be home too
late. which is good...
school in the morning.
school everyday.

i want to kiss emily.
i want to kiss her lots.

yeah im done i need to get up and get ready