Matrim

Tales of Tails
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2002-01-10 03:38:39 (UTC)

LIGHTEN UP!

Ok, I got a gripe. I know, I've done nothing but write
about the gripes I have, but this one is at the core of my
sense of humor. People need to get those Red Sequoias out
of their asses and start to laugh a little bit more. I
mean, what's with people and their damned pride all of a
sudden? It's rediculous. I've always said that unless you
can throw shit at it with all the rest of the monkeys, you
can't appreciate it. That goes for your sense of self, as
well.

For example: I love it how girls always call themselves
fat, especially when they're extremely skinny. "Oh, I'm up
to a size 1. I'm getting fat!" and they laugh. That's
awesome. I mean, obviously there's nothing wrong with your
physique. I'm sorry, but if you're a size 1, you've got
nothing to complain about as far as your body goes. So
flaunt it! Why the hell not? God gave you a gorgeous body,
so go with it. Call yourself fat. Everyone knows you're
not, and if it motivates you subliminally to drop back to a
size 00, so much for the better. Focus your inner criticism
on your personality or something. No one's perfect, but
some of us do have ideal traits. Rather than waste time
criticizing those traits to death, go improve your
vocabulary or something.

The last thing I want to do is rag on the people who showed
support for the heroes of Sept. 11th, but there were some
major flaws there. The same people who were waving flags
outside of their homes and claiming that the government was
so wonderful for the way they handled everything are the
same people who didn't care enough to vote in the local
elections. They take all the credit in the world for the
things the government did, and only 20% of them made it to
the voter's booth in November. Kinda funny.

People need to start taking life less seriously. I love the
math teachers who teach their kids that math is life. No,
sir, math is life to YOU because YOU made a career choice
that reflects how much of a NERD you were in college. Those
who can't do, after all, teach. Those who can't teach,
teach math. So when I make a crack about calculus not being
important, just smile and brush it off. Truth is, the fate
of the world does not depend on me knowing calculus. When I
say that if I stopped learning math right now, I could
balance a checkbook and have all the math I'd ever need in
my capabilities, laugh with me. The only other reason you
know math is because you spent 30 grand a year to go to
college to learn it. It's not like you use trigonometry
every day. Get over yourself. You're not a math guru, and
even if you were, I am not your apprentice.

If everyone learned to get over themselves, the world would
be a much nicer place.

My 2 cents.
Matrim


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