nothin left to say
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2002-01-10 03:36:56 (UTC)

I was ridin high for so long..

I was ridin high for so long (well 4 days), I almost
forgotten what it feels like back on earth. shit, its been
a while. I don't know what i can do to change any of the
stuff thats happened because frankly, i don't know why its
happened. Like i dont know why erin stopped talkin to me. i
don't know what to do about my other friends who live far
off. they truly were my best friends at one point, but i
think my incessant depression pushed them away from me. i
wish i could have a second shot with this girl who i was
good friends with. I mean, we're still in contact and we
still talk online and stuff, but its clearly not the same.
we confided in each other for a long time (maybe like a
year and a half to two years), and i guess, after she
realized that I'm not the prince in shining armor, that it
kinda went south. i dunno. maybe im over analyzing and
thinkin about this stupid shit too much. i can't play all
these mind games that everyone else pulls me into. I'm just
gonna be myself, a good, loyal friend to whoever wants my
friendship, and if they need me, I'll be there. there's
nothign else i can do.

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