lindsay ann

somewhere in between
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2002-01-08 05:18:57 (UTC)

snip & sniff

ok that was so retardishly lame, but whatever. i cut my
hair today. only like an inch but it looks pretty even for
once so i'm happy. i've almost mastered the self-haircut.
i can feel myself getting closer. maybe once my hair gets
longer it'll be easier. i think i'm growing it out again.
i'm pretty sure. i dunno. i wanna do dreadlocks
eventually and all the crazy plans i have require long
hair. plus i want to get it braided this summer, whether
for caleb or just for spending a lot of time @ the beach.
ahh i'm sure a dork...

well hey on june 7th (in 5 months!), i'll be out of
school. i'm already stoked about summer like you wouldn't
believe. plus next semester will be easier with no sport,
plus i'll only have 6 classes. ahh.

alright anyway, the sniff part is this: one of my good
buddies at school, jeff, was really good friends with the
two guys that were killed in westlake over christmas
break. i was talking to him a few days ago, and he was
telling me how he can't get over their deaths because he
knew that neither of them were christians. it broke my
heart to hear him so upset. it seriously did.
and then, today, some insensitive fool in choir was talking
about it, and i looked at jeff and he looked like he was
going to faint or something. all day he hardly talked, and
it's so hard to see people so broken apart by something
like that!

plus, they died only 2 weeks after jennifer died, and
everybody's feeling that too. justin and lauren were
especially hurt by it, and they still don't want to deal
with it. i don't know. i guess my point is that it's hard
to see people going through this stuff...i mean it has an
effect on me, but not nearly as much as if i'd been good
friends with the people, ya know? and i'm not trying to be
insensitive...i just can't let myself fall apart every time
this stuff happens, cuz it seems to happen more & more as
you grow up. i don't fully know what i want to say...but
it hurts me to see people i care about hurting. it stinks.

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