sushi91984

Nicolas Reyes
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Ezoic
2002-01-07 04:07:29 (UTC)

if you could change would you?

This last year on winter break has made me think back on my
life, my friend Zach, whom I have had for my high school
life , asked me if I had a chance to change what you did
in high school, would I? Graduating from High School is
the fork in the road for most people, you can succeed and
become great in life, or you can fail and live always
waiting for your break and wondering what could have been.
The thought of not being able to do what I want in life has
haunted me day after day. I have seen my grades and made
these promises, to myself and others, that I truly
intended on keeping. I will try harder, I will do my work,
and now on the last leg of my high school education I now
see where I have gone wrong.
This year has brought back the most tormenting and
gratifying memories in my life back. Each and everyday I
remember those memories that I shared with those friends
who said back in the third grade, “friends forever”, back
then my life was so great and simple. I loved everything
and everyone. Today I talk to none of those “friends
forever” and I say to myself, then I thought that we would
all grow up together and be so happy. Now that I am older I
see how tunneled my vision on the future was. I now know
that nothing in life is forever, everything has its end.
Nearly four years have gone by and I know that I
could have done so much more with this time. Have you ever
wondered why you are the way you are? I do all the time,
and I plan on things way to much that I never get anything
done. I have a plan on the way things should be and if one
thing goes wrong or out of place, I have to stop and fix it
before I can continue, half the time I am trying to
complete something I spend more than half my time
organizing everything and trying to return it to the way I
want it. My goals have always been there for me and I want
to fulfill them to the letter but I now see that nothing
can be exactly the way you want you can’t have, “you cant
have your cake and eat it to .”
My dream occupation in life is to be a graphic designer at
a large movie corporation. Now how can I get myself there.
School, why does it have to be the one thing that I cant
even do at the high school level. Now I want to proceed to
the higher level and get a degree, how can I possibly
attempt to do this.
Life’s experiences from the young friends in grade
school making a pact to be “friends forever” to the present
high school days were I cant even do simple assignments to
succeed in a class. All these experiences have taught me
that life cant be handed to you on a silver platter all
those people who have made it big in music, life, or a
career have had to make large sacrifices to get where they
are today. I have said in the past that I know this, but do
I fully understand what this means. Can I after nearly
four years of life‘s experience comprehend the way the
world works and understand that on September 19, 2002 I
will be responsible for my own actions and thoughts, no
more airbag in life‘s ride. I will have to accept the
beauty and suffering that I bring upon my self. Before I
answered my friend Zach I asked him why would you change
your life if you changed anything about your life you could
change a lot more than you think, everything has a link to
another. Then I said after all the bad things that have
happened to me in these fours years, and trust me I’ve gone
through a lot of torment. I wouldn’t change anything I my
life because if I changed but one thing it could dissolve
one great memory that I had, but now that I think about it
I would change one thing, I would ask Nicole out, but I
guess it’s never to late.


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