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2002-01-01 02:31:22 (UTC)


sometimes i dont understand her at all.
sometimes i want to run away and just sit in a corner and
i dont understand how she can be so completly unsympathetic
to my feelings.
she told me not to fucking come back if i was going to be a
like i was the one being a bitch.
like i was in the wrong.
how can she expect me to know which option to choose?
without any imput.
and when i choose wrong.
well FUCK ME.
fuck me im a huge bitch
and a stupid one at that.
she makes me feel stupid.
she doesnt listen to me.
she doesnt understand me.
there is so much i would do for her.
so much i have given her emotionally.

i should not be treated like shit.
i cant fucking help being in love with her.
i am so fucking in love with her.
but i dont understand how she can treat me like such
fucking shit sometimes.
like i deserve it?
i try so hard to make her happy dealing with little things
in everyday life
and its just unnoticed.
or unappreicated.
or a mixture of both.

i feel like nothing i do for her.
is enough.
like all the good things i do are overshadowed by trival
little bad things i may do unconsciencly.

happy new year everyone.

i hope that this year is better than the one i just got
done with.
and i think...it will be.
i think it is already.