g ir l nex t d o or

Fire Lillies H2O
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2001-12-31 19:41:56 (UTC)

newyeareveday wow/.

Okay, so I am feeling fucked up.
I had this nightmare about my parents dyig. I took the
vanilla sky scenario but the crazed stalker girl was my
parents not in the obsseivse way, but htat they died
violently, but I feel like they were shot , and the house
was dark as in lite but dim. I kept hearing Hedwig becasue
it played al night until I turned it off at 5:30. I am glad
to be affectd I am letting it affect me, but dear god.
bottling will last forever, so to speak while this is
violently ripping me up in mere moments. yet every passing
minuteis a chance to turn it all around. I can't believe a
year has passed, but I am running out of time. Safety time
that is...I need somewhere to go . something better pick me
up soon. I need to be in the right place at the right time.
I need to start it all. I need to be directing or
designing...i need my own job that I write the chercks
for...5year limit kiddo. I will be 27. I f I don't have
answers then then what? Ehy rush through school or life.
Ypou are not rushing towards anyone.are you? maybe you are?
your life is intereesting wnat a friend no fucking been
there done that or yea. I just want to cook food in my
kitchen and hear somelaughter where's my sisters i hate it
when I feel skitzy. I need foood I slept for 10 hrs iam
tired Iguess.....wow. next week could kill.
gnd


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