jenabean

Jena's Rants
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2001-12-29 04:03:45 (UTC)

My many spastic moods.

Women have a form of muliple personality disorder (MPD) all
their own. It's also known as PMS. I am such a total
bitch/sad emotional basket case/victim/evildoer/wanna be
single/completely head over heels in love/happy/depressed woman
who may completely lose it at any moment,and that is all in
the first five minutes of this day! I am not used to
feeling this much.
For the past, well I don't know how many years,
practically my whole life I have just gone through numb.
Now I have all of these different emotions to contend with,
not to mention other people's reactions, and how I react to myself.
I am use to keeping
my feelings bottled up inside, I am only supposed to serve
others. I never use to say a thing if I opposed it and
thought that I would have the other person mad at me for
saying what I really felt. I would die before I said, hey
I am tired of hearing about your shit and never getting to
talk about me. Not anymore, I say it now. I don't know if
that is good or bad, but hell - at least it's progress. I
haven't succeeded in all manners of this, yet........but I
am working on it. I have a feeling that a certain someone
is going to get tired of it real quick. I can't say that I
am going to be okay with that, but call it women's
intuition, I have a feeling that Jena's get in touch with
who she is time is going to be a real piss him off kind of
event. See you have to move at your own pace, not the pace
that others want you to, and when you move at that speed
you often get where you're going, but it's all alone. Only
time will tell.


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