Thoughts from Blue Angel
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Masks: An Epilogue
Don't be fooled by the face I wear, for I wear a thousand
masks- and none of them are me. Don't be fooled, for God's
sake. Don't be fooled. I give you the impression that I'm
secure, that confidence in my name and coolness is my game,
and that I need no one. But don't believe me.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion, in aloneless, in
fear... That's why I create a mask to hide behind, to
shield me from the glance that knows. But such a glance is
precisely my salvation. That is, if it's followed by
acceptance- if it's followed by love. It's the only thing
that can liberate me from my own self-built prison walls.
I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing and that I'm just no
good, and that you will see this and reject me.
And so begins the parade of masks. I idly chatter to you.
I tell you everything that's really nothing and nothing of
what's everything, of what's crying within me.
Please listen carefully and try to hear what I'm NOT
saying. I'd really like to be genuine and spotaneous- and
Me- but you've got to help me. You've got to hold out your
Each time you're kind and gentle and encouraging, each time
you try to understand because you really care, my heart
begins to grow wings- very feeble wings, but wings. With
your sensitivity and sympathy and your power of
understanding, you alone can release me from my shallow
world of uncertainty.
It will not be easy for you. The nearer you approach me,
the blinder I may strike back. But I'm told that love is
stronger than strong walls, and in this lies my hope- my
Please try to beat down these walls with firm hands, but
gentle hands, for I am very sensitive.
Who am I you may wonder. I am every man you meet, and also every
woman that you meet. And I am you also.