Lt.Shorty

Psychotic Rambles
2001-12-27 20:37:08 (UTC)

Grrrr...Justin

well, as to christmas, i went over to nicks house and we
played video games all day. i got addicted to tony hawk.
love that game. anyway, the day after i went to see justin.

first with rian. we talked and later i went back and
oooooohhh he tried to get rid of me so hard, but i just
wouldnt go away. like the thing that wouldnt shut up. and
his mom made him walk me to the gate. he was all flirting
with me, like snoball fights and tackling me and we even
fell down some stairs. then i climbed on top of him, and
asked if he was ok, and then got off. then we kept walking
and we had fun sort of and so then i was like where's my
kiss and he gave me this teeny tiny loser kiss. oh well.

so then i see him again today, drag him over to
meghan/katelyns house and we kinda down him like usual. but
when we left he was like I dont want to get into a
relationship right now. that fuckin pissed me off.

What you think i spent my time pining over you, hoping you
would run into my arms when you came back and tell me how
much you were still in love with me? You think i never
kissed anyone but you!? goddamnit if you never want to see
me again! fine, just say so but dont make me fuckin believe
that YOU still give a DAMN. i know you like meghan, you did
when we went out and you do now, and rorie got in your way.
you could never lie to me, i just never said anything. well
listen up buddy. i dont expect anything out of you. If you
dont even want to be friends ok. Just tell me why! am i not
good enough. you have a girlfriend. i'm too young. you hate
me. you never even cared. everything was a lie. IS THAT
WHAT IT FUCKING IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????? i will always be
there for you..for everyone. i will be there at a fixed
time every morning if you need me. I will do that for any
of my friends. thats what friends are for. you dont believe
that? that i'm here! god damn. I NEVER FORGOT YOU!! i never
will. i should. you've become more of an insensitive
jackass than before.

i think i'll say that to him. he deserves to get told off.
i like mike. what to do about rian. i cant do this.i dont
deserve rian. thats what it is. and he doesnt deserve to
get stuck with someone like me. i am a horrible mean, evil,
intolerable, annoying bitch. i need someone there for me.
like i thought justin was. but obviously not.


gotta go. i feel depressed. i shouldnt but i do.

love
from bitch




Ad: