bluff before i

God gave me a presious gift...

the 23rd...definately not something i regret...but the
25th...i can't believe that i almost did something that i
would have really regreted...

i care so much about him and i almost let him go...never
again will i try and do that...i think i hurt myself more
than i hurt him...

i love him.

i went to the movies with him, eileen and her best friend(i
already forgot her name)...eileen turned out to be as cool
in person as she is online...really nice and sweet girl,
funny too...

amelie was a really good movie...liked it a lot...for some
odd reason i thought that amelie and nino reminded me a lot
of myself and jeremy...he makes me happy...

i'm going to forget about the past because thinking about
it, i can't forgive myself. so it's better that i don't
think so much at all about it. i almost lost him. i never
want to hurt him.

last night i had fun...finally meeting someone i was
waiting to meet and seeing a movie that i have waited to
see for a really long time...and then being with jeremy
again...it made me feel so much better...because i can
still feel that he loves me all the same...he never changed
his feelings for me...

saying goodbye was hard for me to do last night...i wanted
to be with him...it made it kinda easy by being really
tired though...when we were saying goodbye it was really
cute because he said..."where are you going?"...i told
him, "home"...then we grabbed eachother to hug and we did
and when i was about to turn around and go inside he moved
his hands across my waist really slowly and looked me
strait into the eyes...and we kissed(just a peck but those
are always just as sweet)...i got butterflies...

i fianlly get to take him somewhere he's never been to...
the rose parade...me and my family go almost every year and
every year is better than the year before...he's kinda
excited, just like a little kid so it's really cute...

if i could i would give him everything...he's what i think
about always...

he truly is my world...