Jay

Thoughts in the Confused
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2001-12-24 08:57:23 (UTC)

Christmas Eve

Well, it is early Christmas Eve and I am sitting alone in
my
room in the dark. lol Kind of sad but it actually is
not.
Atleast I am not depressed or anything. Things are not
the
way I would like them all, but when is it ever? Really?

I was just reading the last entry I put in here and wanted
to see what I said. And it made me think. I said I
wanted
love. I wanted a man, but you know, I am not sure what I
want. I am not sure if that is bad or not. Wanting
something that I am not sure I really want, but as I
ponder
that. I think. Isn;t that what we all really do all the
time. We think we know what we want and when we get it.
Nothing. IT is not what we wanted, not what we ecpected
or
I am not sure what else, just not right. We think we know
what we want but it is not that simple. Finding out what
you want is also knowing yourself. and most people do not
know themselves. I included. So I might try and find
that
and find in myself what I want and who I am.

J
jdiary2001 @ gmail (dot) com


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