*blank stare*
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2001-12-24 00:22:04 (UTC)

The Best Weekend of My Life

You know, it was rather strange to go into the same
bathroom stall at Bick's last night that I had been sobbing
hystarically in last weekend with a smile on my face. How
much can change in so little time is simply astounding.
On Friday night, I went up to the Fox Run Mall to meet up
with Bob, and I got there a little early to attempt to do
some shopping for him. On my way out of Suncoast, who did I
see but Kat and the guys. I frolicked on over to say hello,
whereupon Jon proceeded to lean against a wall Fonzie-style
and pretend to be invisible, or something. While I was
talking to them, Bob came over and scared the bajesus out
of me, after which Kat and I left the guys so I could keep
trying to shop for him. I searched Spencer's for like hakf
an hour trying to find a necklace I thought he would like-
and I guess I did well, since he already had the same
goddamn one. Oh well, new necklace for me. And it was great
to hang out alone with Kat for awhile- it feels like I
haven't done that in so damn long.
After we left the mall, we went to OPB's (Old People
Bickford's) for coffee and then parted ways. I had a really
good time there, being with all of the people I love most
without any huge issues, and it was great to see that the
guys are all square again.
After leaving OPB's, Bob and I went to his house, where I
spent the entire weekend, so I could meet his parents. Both
of them are extremely nice people, particularly his mom. It
only took me a short time to feel comfortable with her.
After a little while his father opened up and held some
good conversations with me, which afterwards Bob revealed
totally astounded him. Apparently his dad never talks to
anybody. Ok, maybe he likes me. *Shrug* Either way, it's a
perk. I also became aquainted with his ancient cats, Spunk
and... whatever the other one's name is, I forget- and his
three wolves. Now that was interesting, though only the
youngest one would let me near it. Such beautiful animals.
We went to bed around 1 am, not getting to sleep until
around 4, and you can make your own damn assumptions at
what went on in between.
Saturday morning, shortly after we awoke, Mom came in to
tell Bob he'd had two phone calls from a Chris in
Rochester. Figuring that it was my friend Chris McCauley, I
called him and was told he hadn't been the one. Perplexed,
I *69'd it and got a number I haven't called in nearly two
years but still remembered. I stared at the phone in my
hand for a moment, dumbfounded, and then dialed it.
I was answered by a deeper-than-remembered, but still
familiar, southern-accented male voice. My heart began
pounding hard, and I could hardly get the word out.

Yes, my Kissy is back!!! He flew in on Friday, and tried
calling my place, then got Bob's number from Momma and
called there as well. I had written to him after getting
his letter asking when he was coming, and he never replied.
He said he didn't tell me because he wanted to surprise me-
which I had suspected, and I also had had the feeling that
if he was coming up to surprise me, I wouldn't be here when
he tried to find me. Whaddya know, I was right.
Anyway, Bob, Brian, Picard and I were planning on meeting
with Jess, Bin and Steph at the Fox Run Mall anyway, so I
made plans with Kissy to meet him there.
We got there quite late, due to my boyfriend's vanity about
his hair, and by the time we pulled in the parking lot, my
hands were shaking, I was so nervous about seeing him. I
don't know why.

We were strolling through the food court where I was
supposed to be meeting him, my eyes darting wildly in every
direction to seek him out. Bob has just finished
asking, "Will you even know him when you see him?" when
there was a tap on my shoulder and I looked up to see a
pair of perfectly familiar shining brown eyes.
I joyouslly exclaimed his name and threw my arms about him,
right in the middle of the packed food court. I let him go
and we moved to a less occupied corner area, where we again
embraced each other tightly. I rested my forhead against
his shoulder, basking in the warmth of his arms that I
haven't felt in so long. I had to force myself to let him
go, and even then, I kept hugging him every 5 minutes for
the next half hour or so. I can't even describe how it felt
to see him... I am so shocked I didn't cry. The feeling was
there, but I didn't.
I'd love to say it felt like all 18 months had dropped
away, but it didn't. I was nervous, and I kept seeing him
looking at me, smiling, and I didn't know what to say to
him. I hadn't even heard his voice in 6 months.
We (well, _I_) did some Christmas shopping, and then Steph
had to go home. As much as I didn't want him to go so soon,
I had Robin bring Kissy home too, so I wouldn't have to
drive to Gonic then back to Maine. We arranged to meet
again with Jess and Bin at the PTC Bick's at 9.
With some time to kill, Picard and Bob, the video-game
whores that they are, went to the software store to play
a "let's beat the crap outta each other" game while Brian
and I won a fight with the laces of my new knee- length
boots and talked. Bri is such a cool fucking guy- he
finally really talks to me, and I think I entertain him
rather well. Not that I try or anything, he just seems to
think I'm funny.

Bri and I tracked down the two most desperate members of
Video Game-Aholics Anonymous and we went to PTC Bick's,
where we had arranged to meet with Kat, Mike, and Brian
We went in to see Jess, Bin, Brian G, Mike, Kat,and Nick.
After myself and the three guys were seated, who stumbled
in but Jacob and Jon, with to girls I'd only met once
before, Kerry and Martay (Sp?). They seemed uncomfortable
at first, but they appeared to be having fun.
I gave Kat and the guys their Christmas presents, and we
all spent a good deal of time there, just being our usual
crew. It was absolutely wonderful. Even with Jon B, Tony,
Steph and Norty missing (and Seth, not that that is new- I
really miss him sometimes though), it was fun. I love all
of them so goddamn much...
Norty was supposed to be going to Bob's house at 11, so
me, Bob, Picard and Bri made the rounds, gave the hugs, and
said goodbye, everyone else following soon afterwards.
After a quick stop at Bob's house, where Bri and Picard
retrieved their cars and I grabbed my glasses and book, we
were off to Bri's house, where we watched Rush Hour 2.
Well, I read while they watched it and stole my cookies.

After the movie it was already past midnight, so Bob and I
went back to his place and quickly passed out. I slept like
a goddamn log, not waking up until after 1 this afternoon.
Almost a 13 hour sleep- much needed. For three hours we lay
on his bed, just cuddling and talking. I wanted to never
leave. It made me wish that he and I could live in a world
where no one gets old or sick, and there is no work, no
stress, just he and I in his room together, our own world,
with nobody else in that world unless we wanted them there.
I love him so unbelieveably much- it's no wonder we tell
each other that every three minutes or so; love seems like
such a weak word for how we feel for each other, but
there's nothing else we know to describe it.
Bob had posted something in his livejournal
(www.livejournal.com/users/whispered_word) that we think
describes it. It's posted under the title "From the Past"
and it's down the page aways. If none of what I say
following makes any sense to you, then read his.
There is some sort of a connection between us, unlike
anything I have ever felt before. He knows what I am
thinking (ask him about the Magic Fingers Bed, if you are
daring...) and there's a lot of things in our relationship
that simply can't be exclusively coincidental. Just the way
we feel with each other says it, and I can't describe it. I
feel more happy, more loved, more -complete- than I ever
have before. If what we think is right, that souls search
for their other half throughout lives until they find the
one they had lost, the one that completes them, than he and
I are done searching. We have found each other.
We love each other more than anything else in the world-
for when we are together, there IS nothing else in the
world. I am at home in is embrace, while at the same time,
lost in his eyes, in the power of his feelings for me. We
are totally honest with each other- I don't like telling
him when I don't feel well or when I am having more of my
stupid stabbing chest pains, but if he suspects and asks, I
just can't make myself say no, even though he worries so
much about me and it bothers me to make him worry. Many
times, though, he doesn't even have to ask, because he
knows. It's like he can feel my physical pain in his body.
What we have, I want never to end. No, we haven't been
together long at all, and yes, I know I have loved others
before, but never, ever like this. This is more than love,
this is connection, completeness- the fabled bliss, the
hidden utopia that everyone looks for and that I thought no
one ever was able to find. We may have been two of the
most lost, wandering souls out of them all- and somehow,
some way, we found each other, and have become one as we're
supposed to be, to never lose each other again, together
for the rest of eternity...
Or maybe we're both crack- addicts. Either way, the
feelings are the same...

This is one of the happiest times of my life. My family is
doing well, there is the arrival of a new little one to
look forward to, my friends, whom I love as family and have
wonderful times with, seem to be happy or at the very least
not miserable, I am loved, I am in love, I have a good job
which I like and co-workers I enjoy working with, and my
best friend (well, one of two, can't forget Tiff)is back at
my side after an excrutiatingly painful amount of time.
Aside from this deal with the blasted Judicial System,
which I think I am worrying far too much about, really-
everything is right and wonderful.
A week ago, my life had gone to hell and I was only left
alive by Bob's (coincidental?) timing. This week,
everything is better than it has ever been and that makes
that night in Picard's bathroom with my hunting knife to my
wrist feel like years ago. So much can change so quickly...
I have to wonder (not without some trepidation), what will
happen next weekend...

Current Music: Yoko Kanno- The Real Folk Blues
Quote of the Day: "Come, Mandy, escort me to press 2, where
you can be my Adhesive- Goddess." - Scot, from work.