It smells like poop over here
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2001-12-23 09:23:05 (UTC)

im goin on a permanent holiday...

from now on, my topic is gonna be from a song. oooooh,
sounds classy eh? that's from the suicide machines, just so
happened i was listening to it when i signed on. im really
really tired right now. i got my ass worked. i had to work
with 3 morons tonight, so i did most of the work. and i
went to meijer with giulia, then to geneva's with my bro,
now it's 4:06 and im done. now i gotta shower up so i can
be at work at 12 tomorrow. but on the plus side, i got a
leather jacket for $70. im in bidniss with this bitch. i
kinda look all GQ though, with a leather, silver jewelery
all over and a cell phone. but i know who i am, sorta. i
know i ain't no chátch or some preppy fuck, and so do my
friends, so im alright.
i heard a song i hadn't heard in a while, and it "opened
up a door" for me. tonic "you wanted more" i know the
lyrics to the chorus, but i listened to it today. "love is
surely better when it's gone..." i think they're right. too
an extent. but when i was chilling with guilia early, she
brought up prom night. she went with this asshole, i didn't
go at all. i went to andreas. and it was really really
stormy. there were tornado warnings and the power went out.
and andrea said i should spend the night. and i really
wanted to. but for some reason, i couldn't say that to
guilia, i said "i was like 'uhh, yeah, i know we're goin
out n stuff, but no'" the fuck is that? i once loved
someone, and now it feels like nothing but a huge, 7 month
mistake. wasupwitdat?
it's like, i miss being in love, and having someone to
share part of my life with. friends are one thing, but they
can't do the same thing as bf's or gf's, ya know? they fill
a little hole in your soul, and for me, that hole is
empty...once again...but this time, it hurts. im grateful i
don't have andrea anymore, it's not her that im upset
about. it's not having someone. good things come to those
who wait. pscht, i guess. someone gave me feedback saying
that. i hope she's right, but up until now, it hasn't. i
maybe back to write later, im feelin a little bit on the
fucked up/fucked over side of life.

"life is a game that no one wins, but you deserve a head
start the way your life's goin, so throw in the in the
towel, cause your life ain't shit, now take the towel and
hang yourself with it, life's short and hard like a body-
building elf, so save the planet and kill yourself, if your
feel in doubt what your life is all about, hold your head
up high and blow your brains out"

- thanks to the bloodhound gang



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