still single

So my friend Natalie left...she..

So my friend Natalie left...she's fighting with her
boyfriend...I am so tired of being single yet I don't miss
those fights that cause miniature nervous breakdowns...

So I called my ex like an idiot and asked if there was a
chance between us getting back together and he pretty much
said no, that he was going to stay with his girlfriend...I
know I mentined this in a previous entry but I can't
believe was an ass I made of myself...aside from the fact
that he has a girlfriend which was fucked up on my
part...Anyway I was just feeling lonely after the
unexpected disaaster of my online guy...it was a
shame...Why is it so damn hard to meet a nice decent
looking , respectful guy with a sense of humor that wants a
serious relationship. San Diego is full of players...I'm so
sick of all the bullshit lines I get from men that I
meet...it's hard to trust anyone anymore.... so I did
something I swore I wouldnt do and answered another ad
yesterday...a cute cop...well he emailed me back and we
IM'ed for awhile and he asked me out for a cup of coffee at
8pm...well he ends up leaving a message on my cell phone at
6pm saying that something came up...ok I can understand
that...he hs never met me and he probably had a sure thing
going on...but he said he's call me today maybe for luch
and I IM'ed him when he was online and he said he sstayed
home last nightbecause he wasn't feeling well and he's
still sick and that he was going to take some medicine and
go to bed...that was the extent of the IM...oh
well...probably got laid or something...screw him...he
doesn't sound very honest...FUCK I'm almost 28 and my clock
is ticking dammit...I love my dog like he's my child and he
is spoiled wayyy to much because he is pretty much my
family...I want a real family!!!! Then last night I went
with my friend and her boyfriend to Karaoke(got very drunk
and actually sang) there was this cute guy I was talking to
but his friend pulled him away after we'd introduced...well
on my way out I shook his hand and said "it was nice
meeting you" handed him my number and told him to call
me..I figure at least I'm trying ...probably too hard but
damn I want the whole white picket fence scenario and SOON!

Will keep you posted