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2001-12-21 05:30:21 (UTC)

Something to care about

As my dear friend emi so elegantly put it, "We're the cell
phone generation." We're a generation defined by our
technology for communicating, and we can't unite. We have
our phones and our internet- we're "connected" and "plugged
in" but we're furthur apart then ever. We're losing
gestures and then inflection, we're losing shades of gray
in our interactions with people and we think we're becoming
closer. We're taking face-to-face contact with other forms
and being convinced we're still feeling something.
Technology is taking our humanity away and giving us
nothing in return but a lie to be swallowed lie sleeping
pills people take every night because they're bodies are
trying so desperately to make them think, because their
minds are trying so desperately to be fed after a day of
media and working to think like everyone else- a teacher, a
boos, a customer. We all think alike, in the end. We can't
even believe that thouands of people are dying because it
looks like a Hollywood plot. We respond with anger, with
little flags and flag-shaped cakes to sell in store
windows, with helplessness. We ask the media how we should
feel. Emi told me she had no opinion about the war in
Afghanistan, that it wasn't a "real" war. It might not be
real for us, but it's sure asell real for the people dying
with pieces of shrapnel from our bombs embedded in their
skulls. We can't find a way to shock anymore- homosexuality
is fine by us, dyed hair could move us less, our parents
smoke up with us. We have no cause to fight for. We don't
even shock ourselves by being jaded. No one ever tells me
I'm too young to have experienced the things I have. It's
commonplace, now. We're not even shocked by our lack of
response. We're blank, dead, waiting to be filled in. What
did we contribute? What events mark our life? I'm terrified
we'll be remembered for Monica Lewinsky. We have no
contribution for history, so we'll make a contribution to
the tabloids. In America, that will last longer. In my
school, the student body hasn't united in the memory of any
of the students. We can't care enough to rally, and we
fight over petty differences. We're pathetic. We bow to the
government (the administration) because we're too weak to
make decisions for ourselves. It's not safe to care. We
risk our own necks and hearts and hell, probably our
spleens too. I need a cause, something real. I can care
passionately about Tibetan Freedom and peaceful response to
terrorism and the trimester system, but what can I do?
We're helpless. We have no faith that we can rely on
ourselves for change. Rather, I rely so much on myself that
I can't rely on everyone to change things together. I'm
convinced no one will ever help me, and a people divided
will always be ruled by a unified government.
That's an absurd amount of babble. I refuse to continue

Love and color TV,