Tinker_Bell

"Turn round and round like a child.....and then go to Siena."

OK, so this is weird: today I went to the church of St.
Francis of Assissi, with my mom. There were a few people
there praying and stuff to some other saints on some minor
altars on the sides of the church. Poor Francis was like
all alone! No one prayed to him, on the major altar.
I also wanted to give some money for the poor people that
the brothers usually help.
So I took my wallet, and aproached one of the minor
altars, and put some money in it, as people usually do.
This altar was close to Francis' altar (well, yeah, I like
to call him Francis as if he was my close friend ;)
So after I did my deed (no pun intended), I turned, and I
was facing Francis' altar. So I looked at the statue on top
of everything...and I kept staring. It was really odd, I
mean, I was perfectly conscious, and I knew I could control
myself, but still, I couldn't keep my eyes off of it; I
didn't even blink! Must've been like a whole minute,
staring, without blinking, and in the middle of that, I
suddenly felt like crying. For like no reason. I wasn't
thinking of anything sad. I wasn't even thinking of
anything specific at all, I just felt like crying, while
staring at Francis. Tears were beginning to come out of my
eyes, and I suddenly snapped out of it. I looked away, and
when I looked back, everyhting was 'normal' again. I was
blinking, and looked at other things, and even though I
tried to do the same thing again, I couldn't. It was a one
moment thing.
I'm not saying that I had an 'illumination' or any
sillyness like that ('who, me!?'), but still, it was kind
of weird, how being perfectly able to get a hold of myself,
and perfectly to conscious as to put myself together, I
felt like I couldn't, like SHOULDN'T; and the weirdest
thing was definitely the crying part.
How odd. Hmm...^^

I'm feeling jolly good today, so I'm gonna explain the
title of this entry (just coz I don't think anybody
actually cares to know...and I'm so annoying ;)

I'm reading 'The Fioretti' (Little Flowers of St.
Francis), just out of curiosity (ever since I watched
Zeffirelli's 'Brother Sun, Sister Moon'...), and it's like
all the chapter titles go a little like 'of how St.
Francis, as usual, asked one of his brothers to punish
him', or 'how he fasted for 40 days and then ate 1/2 a loaf
and felt guilty for it, so he punished
himself...again', 'or how he had a bad thought (ONE BAD
THOUGHT!!!) and asked a brother to -you guessed it- punish
him again', yadda, yadda, yadda; so, he keeps suffering
punishment through the whole book, and I was getting kinda
sick of it, until I found this chapter called: 'how St.
Francis made brother Masseo turn round and round like a
child, and then to go to Siena'...
And it was just so funny, coz like it had no sense! It had
sense up to 'turn round like a child', but then it was
like 'OK, now that you did what I asked you, go to
Siena.'...
I dunno, I thought it was funny...bleh

This post is longer than I wanted already, so I'm gonna
stop now. The rest of my day is in the 1-2 following post
(s).