You don't want to read this
2001-12-20 22:56:12 (UTC)

Another rerun of the X-Files

The X-Files are a rerun again. I don't like any of the new
episodes. They took away Mulder and Scully and now I have
no interest in the shows new episodes.

I think I'm getting a cold. Maybe not though. I have a
little bit of a sore throat but that could be from chewing
that cinnamon gum for too long. And I probably feel tired
because I've been up since 6 am and I worked all day. If I
get sick, oh well. What do I care.

Mom just came in. Later dad will come in drunk. Bastard.
He'll try ot be my friend again. I hate him sometimes.
Other times things are ok. Well, ok isn't quite the right
word but, it will work for now.

I don't want to be here. I want to be here less now than I
did on the 14th when I was crying because I didn't want to
go home. I hate that my mom treats me like I am less
responsible than I was 6 months ago. I have been living on
my own for 5 months and now she decides that I am not a
capable human being. I have to have a curfew now when I
never had one my whole life. What the hell?

I don't know what the hell is going on. Everything is all
screwed up. I don't want to be here. Yet, I have no other
choice and I have no clue what I want to do. I don't want
to live and I don't want to die. I need to figure out what
the hell I need to and want to do.