fionasunshine

i will survive

the closer that january 10th gets (26 days) the weirder i
seem to feel... it's like, hard to describe, and it gives
me a headache, and 26 days seems like such a short time...
i mean, 26 days. a week. 5 days of school left THIS
MONTH. and a lot due and to do in those 5 days, yet it is
such a short week. and then... someone told me christmas
is coming up... like 10 days from now... and i don't have
presents to give. janna asked if i'm getting her a
present. im sure she would consider it a grave injustice
if she gave me one and got nothing in return. she makes me
really mad sometimes, i make her mad too, but most of the
time i dont even know what i do to make her get so upset at
me! i just wanted pizza and dads paying her back and she
could had said no instead of offering and then getting made
for me even wanting the damn pizza in the first place...
and i know my parents didn't even understand why she got
mad either. it frustrated me too... and i do not hide
behind "stupid passive aggresive crap" and i hate being
called a brat and i hate that she feels like i am spoiled
and she is always treated worse than me and that i am the
star the angel the loved verses her. it sucks, because i
thought we were finally having one day where we didn't have
to avoid eachother like the plague and stay on opposite
ends of the house or if in the same room both silent, or me
silent and her talking to mom... it's all crap and really
dispise that our relationship has to be like that... i
mean, it sucks... i'm scarred of my own sister. anyways..
happy hannukah. i've missed the last two days of lighting
my little computer manorah because of this and that,
tommorrow night is the last night... the night when jewish
households everywhere have 9 candles lit, burning in the
twilight. it's such a great holliday. it's such a shame
our school doesnt' teach about it in the least bit... there
aren't even any manorah decorations or pictures of dreidles
anywhere in the primary school, so your argument that
christians should be allowed to say "merry christmas" as
much as any other religion could say happy hanukkah or
happy ramadan is weak because our school isn't including
every religion (or even more than one) so why do we even
celebrate one? i mean there are christmas trees in every
school and administration building in the school district
but not one manorah. it seems rediculous. if you don't
bring in a manorah and teach students what the signifigance
of lighting the candles are each night than yes, call
any "christmas" tree on the premesis an evergreen tree. I
didn't learn about hannukah other than knowing that it was
a jewish holiday until we learned about it in girl scouts.
this year i am celebrating both hanukkah (on my own) and
christmas by my own free will and maybe i will celebrate
the chinese new year too... another holiday untouched by
Canandaigua schools...
my host family wanted a boy who was staying for a whole
year not a girl staying only half a year. yikes... i gotta
pack and i dont' know what i will pack.
okay... i gotta go.
~me.