Happy days, and then those other ones
2001-12-13 22:20:56 (UTC)

shakespeare rocks and rolls

you do look, my son, in a moved sort
as if you were dismayed, be cheerful, sir.
our revels now are ended, these our actors,
as i fortold you, were all spirits,
and are melted into air, into thin air.
and like the baseless fabric of this vision,
the cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces,
the solemn temples, the great globe itself,
yea all which it enherits shall disolve,
and like this insubstancial pageant faded,
leave not a rack behind. we are such stuff
as dreams are made on, and our little life
is rounded with a sleep. sir, i am vexed.
bear with my weakness, my old brain is troubled.
be not disturbed by my infirmity.
if you be please, retire to my cell
and there repose. a turn or two i'll walk
to still my beating mind.

when you cry it hurts me.
you cry a lot.
it's my fault.
i'm sorry.

my mind is so full but i can't really tell of what right
now. all i feel is that i should be overwhelmed and
emotional that i can barely stand upright and be so full of
things to say that i am never shutting up. so many things
to process at one time. i think my beating mind has
decided to take a holiday and just knowing that i know and
think and should think and do think right now makes me so
tired and i dont' know how to process my life and WHAT THE
HELL IS GOING ON HERE??? that's all i really want to know.

more on this subject is to come, and perhaps it will make
more sence.

i had so much to say and i didn't say anything. why is it
all stuck up there when it should be said and heard and
known and realized and reacted at? how many ways can i
skirt what i want to say. is it really that big and
important that i can't come right out and say what is on my

but the thing is... it's like i can't even say it because
it's something that i don't know yet and that i don't know
how to put into words and i'm afraid of the reaction. and
i'm not even afraid of other people's reactions but rather
my own reactions and what will happen when i actually see
and hear and know what i know but am somehow keeping hidden
way deep inside. and everything is really huge and yet so

needless to say, shakespeare rocks.

i love my mom.

just wait.