Jo Lacey

In My Eyes
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2001-04-04 19:48:10 (UTC)

I made this "public" because I..

I made this "public" because I have no secrets. At least, I
feel I should have no secrets because they are a burden at
times. All I ask is that you meet me...don't try to soar
above because that's not the purpose of this. Some days I
will sound depressed, insightful, or so on.. you get the
point. I'm a senior in high school. A female I might add.
I haven't been "street" broken, but I have had my fair share
of serious burdens. This is just an introduction. I'll
need to get used to this before I can really diffuse my
essence. I'm keeping a lot in right much for no time.
I wish i had a day today where there was a positive
epiphany. I'm all foggy up top. It bothers me how some
days I wake up and face the sun and let it really go through
my eyes and warm my heart, but then some mornings I wake up
and cringe at the sun for its brightness. What I really
hate the most is when I hate that I hate. That's when I'm
somewhere in between which is just the worst because I can't
think a real statement. It's as if I don't have enough
confidence or gravity to assert myself onward and I'm
suspended in a kind of trance cloud. And no, this isn't
even when I'm smoking fact, I've decided that I'm
beyond marijuana. I wouldn't say that I'm a "pot head"
varies, but senior year has been the peak of my
smoking..probably twice a week. Anyway, that's boring.. I
don't care about weed. It's not interesting, just some
juvenile release. I don't even like calling it a release
because sometimes it can really trap you. What am I saying?
I've lost my thoughts...hmmm. Oh well. I kind of have to
go anyway..I have 3 tests tomorrow, but I haven't taken my
bag out of the car in 2 months. It's amazing that I'm not
failing. Actually, it kind of pisses me off that I'm still
getting A's and B's and I'm not even doing a thing. More to
come later.. goodbye