Love, Life, and So Much More
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2001-12-11 01:44:32 (UTC)

Ranting and Raving

I hate high school. I hate the people there, with their
snobby attitudes and their degrading ways. I try my
damndest to be a nice person to everyone. I don't judge
people and I certainly don't talk about people. I always
smile and treat everyone the same. I try not to hold
grudges against anyone and I really, really try to bite my
tongue when my temper tries to get the better of me.
Regardless, there are STILL people who like to treat me
like crap. People whom I don't even know, whom I've never
held actual conversations with. A lot of the time I don't
see the point in being so nice and friendly. I rarely get
the same feelings from people around me. I should be used
to it I guess, since I'm a military brat and I'm always the
odd one out. The new girl, the shy girl. Being shy around
people I don't know has killed me. I think people assume
I'm a snob because I don't talk a lot around strangers, but
I'm not a snob, I just don't know what to say, I just don't
want to look stupid. People who have never been in my
position before don't seem to understand this. So I deal
with the rejection and the rumors all on my own.

Just today for example, I found out a few rumors that had
been circulating about me last year and the year before
(and maybe still this year, I don't quite know). Someone
tried to tell people that I was a lesbian! Not that
there's anything wrong with being gay, but c' A
lesbian?! That's ridiculous...if you know me, you know I'm
totally straight. Another nasty thing going around was
that I'm a whore. Yea, so I made a really bad mistake last
year, but it was ONE mistake and now I'm a whore. Okay, I
know people who have cheated on their boy/girlfriends many
many many times (and having sex with other people), I know
people who have done a lot worse than my one mistake. And
guess what?! No one talks about those people. But for
some reason, I'm the whore. And then there was something
about giving head. Hello?! People do it all the time...I
don't. Yes, I have done it before, but not lately and
certainly not enough to be classified as a whore.

So, whatever dictionary people are using to define whore
needs to check their definition. I may be a flirt, and I
may not be able to keep a steady relationship (but that's
because of totally different circumstances), yet that does
not classify me as a whore. And sometimes I may say that
guys are the shit stuck under my shoe, but that doesn't
classify me as a lesbian.

Rock on,

Song of the Moment- "Let's Begin"-Bad Ronald
Quote of the Day- "Whoever said that high school was going
to be the best four years of your life must have skipped it
too much to really know the truth." --Me