Deadly Nyghtshade

The Shades of Nyght
2001-12-07 05:20:19 (UTC)

The Biker

It's hard to believe that I've known him almost three
years. I still kinda feel like I just met him. Some say
that the best thing about having a b/f or just a really
close is friend is the feeling that you know everything
about them. But that isn't alwyas true. Actually, one of
the best thing about The Biker is that I'm still gettig to
know him. There are so many things that I don't know about
him. Like I still can't pinpoint when his birthday is
exactly. And I don't know his shirt size or how the way he
sleeps. See, this leaves me so much to explore. But at the
same time, that leaves so much room for error. The thing
I'm terrified of the most is that moment when that old
familiar feeling of "it's time to move on" seeps into my
bones. I know that feeling well. Usually, I don't worry
about it, but this time I do. Wait, did I worry about that
with the last one? I probably did, but I could say that I
didn't mean it, but at the time, i was so TRUE to myself.
Ha! That's a laugh. That's a big laugh. Makes me think if
I've been truthful to myself in any of my relationships,
not mentioning being truthful to the people that I've been
involved with. But, I have a feeling that I'm growing up. I
haven't told him that I love him. I haven't even really
said it to myself, b/c i have a habbit of throughing the
phrase around haphazordly. I don't want to do that with my
biker. My Biker. Too possesive? Nah, I don't think so. I'm
his Poet, so I guess it's all good in the end. I miss him.
I want him. I need him. I can't wait to go home to him. My