Damsel in Distress
well, andrea is still gone...i hope she is ok. i know she
is so intelligent and so is jesus so they should be ok.
best of wishes to them.
on another note, i am not nor will i ever experiment or do
drugs. my friend perla overdosed last night at mike's
house. mike's mom is never home. well, they were getting
high and she started tweeking, and mike told her its ok
dont call your parents. she knew she couldnt handle it. she
did what she had to do. she called her parents and went to
the hospital. she called me and told me to call mike and
tell him that he cannot call her or hang out with her.
well, i called mike and left him a message, and he called
me back. he said she was dumb for telling her parents. i
think she did the right thing, she knew she couldnt handle
it. mike is being an asshole. wtf??? how can you say that
someone knows they cannot handle it, so they get help, how
can you fuckin say that is wrong??? paranoia has set in.
mike said that school is not about learning but about
teaching us conformity??? well, he explained it like this:
we dont learn, we go there and we are taught to leave when
the bell rings. i would say, i have to disagree. everything
can bring conformity, just certain extents of conformity
are bad, not all conformity is completely horrible, just
some is better than others. i might be paranoid of the
government or distrustful (i am not nationalistic nor do i
support a lot of our countries decisions), but its like he
is freaking out. he is always freaking out.
ive realized im not like many people. ive always known i
was different. i still cannot explain how i am different,
but i know i think differently. i am direct with people, an
i say what i want to say forward and bluntly...i just ask
for the same back. many people do not appreciate me for who
i am, but that is ok. i know that my difference is good,
and i am not afraid to be a girl who likes sex, doesnt wear
make up, doesnt dress all prissy, and doesnt need to please
anyone. well, i have always been independent, and i hate it
when guys like girls who are codependent meaning dependent
on them in preference.
i was talking to my ex, and he is a complete asshole. he
never tried to get to know me. he said "you need a man." i
was like "that is very insulting. its insinuating that im
codependent." he said,"you're not one of those." i
said, "one of those? i dont need a guy to depend on. i can
take care of myself." he said, "you are one of those." i
said, "what is that supposed to mean?" he said, "gotta go,
first of all, guys cannot give me a present to make me
happy. monetary items are nothing to me. there is so much
more than monetary possesions. when it comes to
relationships, im not the average girl. i dont want a big
expensive gift; i would rather have fun than anything else.
looks are nothing to me, and i would not go out with
somebody with any basis on looks. if i like someone i want
to like that person from within. personality is so much
deeper than looks.
i had fun today. i got off by using my vibrator 7 times so
far today. it was nice.
its november 29th, my birthday is in 28 days...(december
27th for our non counters). christmas is 26 days away.
-damsel in distress