LesTaT

Lethal Dosage

( / )
( ~.~ )
o(( ")(")
"I just want to run fly kites wrestle jump and play
Swim through waves that crash to shore, memories in me
cocooned in misery "

This reminded me of myself a ways ago. Tho still caged,
torn I still walk among people. See there ways they show
there hate. Feeding off me. Peace will never come of much
here .. Not in my life time. Dark for fear of failure.
Maybe if I put on a mask people will think im somthing
different.. someone different.. Maybe I could walk
somewhere with mother.. I could have people look and me and
not say " what the fuck ".. Maybe I would not feel so ugly
inside.Even if I was to die. today. I would die knowing
that there is someone perfect in this world. There is a
perfect love. I with midnight last night at a party for a
friends birth day. She had lost her ring on they way there.
As the happy 16 year old opend her gifts she found it at
the bottom. Later that day as we where talking her ring
fell off. I Picked it up and placed it on her hand and I
was thinking about her at the time and I looked up into her
beautiful eyes. She looked into mine and said one day it
will not be a thumb ring. A close friend " brother
twinkie " has not not been on the happy side of himself as
of late. I talked to him for a short time last night. When
he had to go I wished to call midnight but it was 11
something so I could not. So.. lost and alone I layed on my
bed. Countless times the fan spun. In my mind run.. and
run.. I will hold her hand .. I will protect her.. Though
people dont see me.. Together we will be seen. Everyone
shall see she is perfect. Even in a world that is not...
Everyone who has ever understood anything I ever said
understand this..
fuck money..
fuck your possessions..
Love gets you through..
When everything is gone you will still know there is a
you...

---Unwanted---

Now,
I'm not pretty
And I'm not perfect,
You think you are,
Cuz you're on the surface,
Blame me for everything,
Desert me,
Unperfect,

Scared,
Tattered,
I don't matter,
Feed off your hate,
So your ego gets fatter,
Night is my day,
Cuz I don't see you,
Look at me,
I cant be you,
I have grown,
Unperfect

Now,
I'm not pretty,
And I'm not perfect,
You think you are,
Cuz you're on the surface,
Blame me for everything,
Desert me,
Unperfect,

These thoughts,
They take me every night,
Bleeding at just the site,
Of looking at me,
Unperfect,

Am I someone to anyone?
Do i fit?
Anywhere,
As I am unperfect

I am as everyone else,
Yet I feel alone,

I cry,
My blood is dry,
I grow weaker,
As I am told,
I am anything,
But anything,

Lost,
Feel unloved,
Feel unliving,
Feel noting,

Now,
I'm not pretty,
And I'm not perfect,
You think you are,
Cuz you're on the surface,
Blame me for everything,
Desert me,

I am UnPerFecT....
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LesTaT