dreamer4hope

Dealing with everyday life
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2001-11-26 03:46:22 (UTC)

November 25th, 2001....Happy Birthday Rachel

Today was a pretty normal day. I woke up and stayed in my
pijamas all day. Ok, not a typical day, but when I'm sick
once again it seemed pretty usual. I layed around watching
movies being the biggest bum that I ever knew. Later on in
the night, I recieved an email from one of my sisters. Not
biological, but still as important as my blood sister is.
See her father passed away recently and she's having
troubles coping.

This reminded me of when I had to cope with losing dear
friends and family members. In 7th grade I lost a fellow
classmate. I wasn't close to him once he left our school,
but when he was a classmate of mine I had the biggest crush
on him. I still liked him, although I barely ever saw him
when he went to public school.

Maybe I should back up and give you a background of what
I'm talking about. My parents put me in a parochial school
since I was little(pre-school to be exact) and I grew up
with the same friends. I met Mark in 2nd grade and I
immediatly liked him. In 6th grade his parents couldn't
afford the expense of Lutheran school so Mark went to a
public school. Did I catch you up yet? Well I hope so.

A year after Mark left St. Michaels(the Lutheran school) he
heard the news that Mark got shot and he was dead.
Immediately I thought, why? He had such a long life to
live. He was so smart,funny and talented, but yet his life
ended just the same with all my questions. I soon
encountered death again when my cousin died of Cancer my
sophomore year in high school. I wasn't close to her, yet
when she died it felt like a part of me died also. I can
only imagine what her mother, father, and sisters felt like
if I felt that bad.

This leads me up to tonight. When I recieved this email
from my sister of the sororiety I'm in, all my emotions
came running back. I ask myself one question everyday of
my life...why? I often wonder why things happen the way
they do. Why I face so many problems each day. Even when
I ask the stupid questions, like why is the sky blue, or
the grass green. All things have a purpose, and I, or
maybe noone may have answers to all my questions, there is
a higher power that does, and hopefully all will be
revealed when the time has come.


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