Sleep Junky

nov 22/01

I've been pulling all-nighters like crazy the last week or
so. I've got so many pending assignments and I'm running
out of time. And it's not possible for me to get work over
with by doing a half-ass job either, because I'm so goddamn
obsessive compulsive. This is proabably my most self-
destructive trait. I'm killing myself- not sleeping or
eating in order to push myself to my best effort. That
doesn't sound too bad but at this rate I won't be finished
until Christmas.
Still- with all the stress and panic I have a gut feeling
that everything is going to work out all right. I have
this feeling that I won't fail anything this year; I'll get
everything done and submitted and, best of all, I'll have
learned an important lesson. That I should learn to manage
my time properly! Yeah right, I've been doing schoolwork
this way since first year and will keep doing it well into
grad school. If I make it there. No, WHEN I make it there.
The lounge I'm designing isn't turning out too bad. It's
just taking so long. The concept and theory, or the hard
part, has been established. Now it's just a matter of me
illustrating it.
I've got five other assignemts due as well so I guess I
can't be a sleep junky for a while. Right now, sleep is
the last thing on my mind. Eating is tedious because I
must do it to sustain myself. If I had my own way, I
wouldn't eat- period. It's a waste of time when I could be
doing more productive things.
I'm nont sure if the frantic pace my thoughts are running
at is evident. I feel like I'm in the movie "Run Lola Run"
or something. It's neat though- I feel alive. Nothing is
clouded or made surreal by sleep and dreams. I guess I've
finally reached the state I was yearning to reach in my
other entries.
I'm awake.