bluesubtonic

ambiant pisces
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2001-11-23 03:21:35 (UTC)

introducing me:

this is a new start at a diary. i have tried so many other
diary websites that it has become insanely vexing. i'm not
going to worry about giving information about myself here
because journals are what i need to release the
disturbances or just messages that i want to let out. here
goes: i am seventeen years old (going on eighteen) and from
central massachusetts, not too tall not too skinny. i love
different haircolors, thus my hair is currently a deep red
shade that i absolutely adore. i am a high school senior
(#12 in my class) and i love to dance. raving, introduced
to me by my best friend, has become a prominent part of my
life. it does have a misconception that raves involve
drugs. sadly, but truly, that is not so. because raves
means the opportunity to meet really interesting people.
you can learn so much by getting to know more people and
learn that each and every individual is as amazing and
unique as the cosmic that i adore. it's like picking out a
snowflake in a blizzard or trying to tell the difference
between the grains of sand in the sahara. yes...drugs does
enhance my raving experiences, but don't take it from me
because experience is everything...you have to learn for
yourself what you feel is worthwhile. don't walk with the
dainty idea that a rave is bad. i don't consider myself a
raver because my life does revolve around other activities:
life.
music and friends are everything. my friends means more to
me that i can ever describe. they complete what i miss and
there are absolutely no words that can describe the
happiness that they bring. yes, i know it sounds corny but
that's how i feel. you guys are my world and i love you
very very much. because you guys are the friends that do
not need material possessions to be happy. a long
conversation with you guys mean more to me than a million
diamonds dropped from the sky. because you guys were
promised to me by heaven. and i don't have to wonder where
my angels are anymore. those nights that we stayed up late
driving around and talking at empty parking lots mean so
much to me...getting to you...and knowing myself better
than i ever did before. it would break my heart if our
friendship sinks into a darkness that i'm afraid to turn
into. please don't ever let that happen.
music...what can i say but that i love music. music to me
is a high that can't get from drugs. because when i listen
to music my emotions connect with it and it becomes part of
me. techno is the best thing that ever happened...well to
me anyways. i also like pop and rap too. but not the kind
of pop that comments on how much i want somebody or "come
back to me." i like the ones that actually has a
definition. and the same for rap. i hate hearing how much
money those jiggas make and how much booty they get. it's
terribly irksome. brian transeau (a.k.a. bt) is amazing.
movement in still life is the best album that i have ever
listened to. discerning the fact that i also like incubus
and the related. just listen to the first couple of tracks
and i became compelled to crave for more. his music is an
art that i can't get enough of and his art is ineffable.
his photographs are amazing!
social: i like people who are themselves. i'm not one to
like impression and i'm not impressed very easily. i'm more
impressed with the qualities that are innate than what you
want to show me. therefore meeting someone new is always a
sport for me. the challenge of meeting someone you want to
know well drives me to compete to satisfy my insatiable
appetite for victory. i met my best friends the strangest
way. a cheesecake and a cup of hot chocolate before a
concert at the waterlily cafe, lonely and no one to talk
to. and she came along and just started talking to me. i
never knew that that moment determined our unbreakable
friendship. and through her i met my very best of friends
now.
sexuality: what can i say but i'm bisexual and that people
have to accept that fact. our homophobic society doesn't
like what's out of the norm. but they have to deal with me
because i'm not one to hide what i believe in. don't get me
wrong. i don't go walking around and flaunt my sexuality
but i'm not afraid of letting people know. i've had tons of
girlfriends in the past and trying to experience something
new now. i love girls...guys are a bonus. how can anybody
resist either sex i don't understand...because if i find
someone appealling, i'm not going to deny my hormones.

that's all for now. i bet however's reading has had enough
anyway. so i'm going to say ciao babe.


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