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2001-11-21 10:23:21 (UTC)

4:11 AM CST I can not stand to see You Lonely!!

Dear Diary:
I can not stand to see Honey-Bear lonely and hurt.
I know he is lonely. He is not use to coming home to an empty house and being lonely and by himself.

He is not use to solitude. I am use to being by myself and my solitude is important to me. I grew
up in a house with two other sisters and three brothers, and no space to call my own.

When I needed space and room for myself, I had
to share a bedroom with my sisters and when I wanted to bond with them, they would not bond
with me, because I was not of their flesh and blood.

So LATER ON, I had to make my own extended family.
I married, and it did not work out either three times. The only people I bonded with was Linda and Teresa.

My adoptive family went to extreme measures to destroy my own family. So, I have been by myself
for a very long time.

So my space and solitude is important to me.
I do not mind being by myself. I have been this
way for a long time. When I want to be around people I know where to find them.

Poor Honey-Bear, he is so sweet. I mean he is cute.
I can not understand why some girl has not snatched him up. I can not understand why his ex wanted out
of their marriage, accept for the obvious reasons.

She must have met someone else and did not know how to tell him. He is easy to talk too. Or was it she just grew impatient in trying to conceive again.

Shit, it took me 10 months the second time with my
first ex, Harold Covington. It took me no time with
my second ex, Roy Mock.

Speaking of Roy. He called over the weekend when I
was with Honey-Bear. I missed his call. I never know when that troll is going to bring his ass back into the US from one of his overseas construction jobs.

He calls to touch base with me about our daughter,
Rebecca. She is really fucked up!!!!

I am going to have to spend more time with Honey-
Bear when summer comes and after Rebecca leaves
in June.

I can not stand to see Honey-Bear hurting and lonely. It is my heart I am afraid. It is to soft
and senstive.

Well, let me go. I am on cipro and it is tearing
my stomach apart.

Love, AmericanIrishRose
{Karissa Anne}

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