this thing called life
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2001-11-21 05:26:14 (UTC)


Well, J was sick over the weekend and I didn't hear from
her for a couple of days. In addition to being worried
about her I was starting to get pissed off that she
wouldn't tell me what was going on. Finally, two days
later she calls to tell me she had been in the hospital,
nothing overly serious but enough to spend a night in the
hospital. I was definitely relieved to hear that she was
OK. Later she called to apologize for keeping me in the
dark and said she was feeling like sharing these kinds of
things made her feel too attached and that she has had a
fear of this for a long time ever since she finally got
over her last relationship.

I was actually relieved to hear this. I mean, in spite of
the fact that she has a fear of getting too close, she
admitted that she wants to. I think I just need to be
patient with her. At times I wonder if this makes me kind
of whimpy, like I'm simply waiting for her. I guess,
though, that I'm not going any where and if you find
someone you truly like those kinds of things are worth
being patient over. Plus, this gives the relationship more
time to evolve rather than go through that typical rushed
infatuation that leads you to think you're in love when in
fact you're not.

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