6445bekiM

missin her

i was trainin my buddy brian at algers today. he started
today too. i have to work on thankgiving, which is fine,
cause my family doesn't like me much anyway. ill probably
eat alone again, like last year. my mom usually goes to her
bf's. my brother...i think he's in oregon. but my friend
laura gave me a shout out in her profile about me having to
work on thanksgivin and how my boss sucks. that made me
smile a bit.
im not exactly sure what im going through, but i miss
andrea. her little body, everything about her was little.
she had these little jeans, small shoes and baby-sized
shirts. she was really beautiful. i keep having a
reoccuring vision of her. we were on her couch, she was
sittin to the right of me. kinda funny, she farted, and i
said "aww, babydoll." and she turns her head away and tilts
it down and says, in a sheepish voice, "i can't help it".
she had this long, brown hair that she wore behind her ears
that sorta covered her eyes when she moved her head like
that. i just remembering sayin, "i don't care". for some
reason, that's one of the few things i remember about her.
that was a good day, i don't remember what else happened,
but i know i loved her. i said i miss her, but it's not
like how i felt when we were goin out. when we were dating,
and i missed her, i had a weird feeling in my stomach, now
it's a dull pain in my heart. i don't think i want to get
back together now, but i still want it to happen some time
in the far future. like when im finally in shape, and she
sees me or something. or when we're in our 20's and we meet
up at a club, or respond to the same personal ad or
something like that. i once had visions of her as my wife,
and the mother of my children. i still have that vision.