nohbody special

11/19/01 3:21pm

Okay this is cool I meat a bunch of new people who are
into firedancing, WWIII is over because taneil is moving
out and julz is moving in. Thats cool. My sort of ex sort
of friend still wants to kill herself. Hopefully my present
will keep her from doing anything foolish...I hope. My
friend who might pregnant hasnt talked to me in a few
days but maybe thats a good sign. The girl I am totally
infatuated with still hasnt changed her mind and I am
beginning to think more and more that she is into tom
but only time shall tell. Going back to the valley for
thanksgiving and i get to hang out with family (ugh) and
friends (oh yeah). So that means putting on the two
faces again. Ya know the one for your family that is nice
and polite and straightedge and the other one for your
friends who does hella drugs has sex and shit like that.
Funny how the real me isnt any of the faces i put on for
people. I think it has to do with living up to exceptations.
My family expects me to be good, my friends expect me
to be bad. Jess and tibs dont know what to expect yet
and maybe with a little luck i can avoid putting on too
much of a facadé for them. Weird how i had no
compuntions about being false to the morons on my
floor and my family but i dont want to lie to people ive
known for all of 5 or 6 weeks. Well that is the
conundrum of my life. Anyway I think i should put into
writiing (typing?) this next statement. If it takes
emptying my savings account i am not living in the
fucking dorms next year. I want a house. I want a real
bathroom, a private room (or a room to share with B) a
kitchen. Man i want a kitchen. i miss cooking like
nothing else well thats not true i miss kayla and
christina and all my friends. but cooking is one of those
little things that you get used to having and when you
lose that freedom it really sucks. I have acalc midterm
tomorrow and a chem one next wednesday. On top of
that i have to register for classes on the 26th. My fucker
roomate did it this morning because over achiever he is
he had enough credits to be a sophomore next year.
Oh well fuck him. Oh yeah i forgot to tell you last time i
wrote that he might be moving out next quarter. That
would be hella fucking tight. he would stop bitching
about how much he hates the floor and shit. for
someone who claims to be so christian he must have
forgot the judge not lest ye be judged line or the let he
who is without sin cast the first stone but oh well the
more religious you are the more of a hypocrite. Well
thatll have to do for now.