Midnight

The Nightshade Princess
2001-11-17 03:42:12 (UTC)

Feeling claustrophobic, scarred

I discovered a white bandage on my beloved's arm this
morn. He seemed terribly sad. I asked him about it, but
he told me that he'd fallen, and that it was a long
story... He told me not to worry. I knew better than to
believe he'd fallen in the phsysical sense - there were no
scratches on him aside from whatever it was that lay
beneath the bright, pure white dressing. I suspected the
truth, though I knew not why he'd hidden it from me. Until
the revalation this evening, I spent the day wondering what
had really happened and why he would not tell me what was
wrong. That is what injured me the most. I love him, and
understand how emotions can take control.
I'm only sorry he had to experience this... the
punishing of onesself with a blade. His stripes were born
of frustration and a dislike of himself and his situation.
Mine were born of despair and a dislike of myself and my
situation. I only wish he'd told me this story sooner.
Together I know we can make it. Somehow, we'll find a way.
A friend of mine discovered the results of my latest
lost battle, though the war still rages. Those small, red
marks stood out from the rest of my snow white arm, and I'd
completely forgot they were even there. He grabbed my arm,
nearly pulling it from it's socket, and told me that I
needed to stop (I'm trying!). I think I've officially
scared him. To all I love, to all who love me, I am
sorry. To LesTaT - I love you. Stay strong