Tainted Perception
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2001-11-16 01:40:56 (UTC)

shattered to pieces

I've never been more scared in my life than I was monday
night. I should have sensed it comming. I should have done
Bringing amanda home, she proclaimed that she'd rather i
get in an accident with her then get in one alone. i dont
think she expected it to actually happen.
as of now whose fault the actuall collision was is still
unknown by me. I just recall side swipping another car and
losing control. I remember amanda screaming as my foot was
glued to the accelartor. I remember screaming her name as
we collided with the tree.
I was in hysterics, and the powder from the air bag was
making it hard to breath. I felt nervously for the door and
turned off the car, crying in anquished when i was too weak
to open the door, scared of suffication, when the now
glassless windshield left us plenty of air to breath.
I looked to amanda, who calmly proclaimed. "i think i wet
myself", and wondered if maybe this was some fucked up
dream. then why did it hurt so much?
amanda had guessed her leg was broken... and was proven
right. i was just thankfull she was alive. the medics
crowded around me and were shouting for someone to call a
helicopter. after putting me in an ambulence when they
learned it was too foggy for a helicopter... they got
amanda...whom apparently was cracking jokes the whole way
they wouldn't tell me her situation, and proceeded to cut
my cloths off. i could feel the blood trickling down my
face and the throbbing pain in my wrist. they wheeled me in
the hospital, again seperate from amanda, and worked busily
on talking blood from my arm and cutting the rest of my
cloths off.
amanda broke her phemer bone in her thigh, and had to get
surgery the nexr day. she went home today, and is using
crutches. other then that and a few scratches from the seat
belt, she didn't even look like she was in an accident.
i broke my ankle and shattered four bone bones in my wrist.
i ruptured my ear drum and i have a gash on my eye lid,
along with plenty of bruises on my face from the air bag,
and burns on my hip and neck from the seat belt. i have
surgery on tuesday.
we should have died. thats what the mechanics and everyone
else have said. the windshield should have rained all over
us when it popped but it diddn't.... no one could find the
glass. my car is so old that the air bag shouldn't have
gone off... but it did. and if it didn't... i would have
gonr in to the steering wheel and died.... and our seat
belts saved our lives. amanda saved mine. if she died...
i'd want to kill myself.
i didn't believe in god before... i didn't know what to
believe in... i still don't know what to believe in.. but i
do believe someone was watching over us.... someone knew we
had to survive.... amd that we had to do it together.