2001-11-15 20:11:41 (UTC)


I don't keep up with this thing the way I use to before.
Well, I'm going through one of those "depressing moments."
I mean, I don't know what it is to be exact. Like, the fact
that I have soooo many decisions to make about college and
the future, is making me crazy. It's like no one has told
me what to expect ahead of me. I hate the fact that I have
to go to Baldwin because they could careless that they are
producing nothing but failures. I know I'm almost of age
(18), but someone along the line was suppose to tell me
something. I feel like I've been cheated...majorly. But
hopefully, all these feelings will pass and I'll be okay. I
need a hero to come along and make this okay. There is
Rufus, who I do still kinda like. I mean, it's been a while
since I, Jocelyn Mc Duffie, have been in a relationship. I
know he likes me and I like him too, but I won't do right
by him. I know I will continue to talk to other dudes. Man,
I feel bad about this. There is this part of me that wants
to be in a relationship with him and then there is this
part that says stay single like you've been in the past. I
don't know what to do about the situation.
AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! I hate this shit. Okay, now that
I've screamed some of it out....I am actually looking
forward to something. Next week, we got of school Tuesday.
Kellen is coming home and I might be able to chill with
him. Then, Leroy is coming home....I think. I don't think I
will do much talking to him, but I'm not all the way sure
about it yet. Well, I guess I might hit this thing up again
before the day is over. *JLYN*