.Scream Your Dream.

Emo Violence
2001-11-13 22:07:49 (UTC)

it was real autumn out today

very nice outside, warm and fall-ish. i broke out my new
mittens from yesterday but i didnt need them anymore this
afternoon. ive been a little gloomy, i think, not
depressed, just sad. yesterday was awesome, we went to
philly, to south street, shopped at the cool stores and ate
at the fun places. it was a good time, i bought a bunch of
records, including the new JEW bleed american vinyl, the
clap, weston adn some more. i also got awesome mittens for
2 bucks at this thrify place, we had a great time on south
street, i only spent 35 too, which is decent for what i
got. my mom thought i went to west chester, so i couldntve
come home with anything too Philly.

more sad things: game over is over. over. this game is
over. no, thats actually ozma, but still game over is
breakng up, friday is their last show, im sad cause our
scene is departing with it, inevitably. this love is over.

excite bike is gone too. their show is friday, a few blocks
from game over's what a sad day. jew is such good music.
made me cry today, maybe thats just the emo seeping out,
but id ont know. im hungry. my mind is crazy over jim, i
cant read his signals and feelings, hes pretty confusing,
maybe thats just me again though. i dont know what to do.
so im doing nothing.

shows for 4 consequtive weekends, one is mine, 2 are zacs,
a few are legacy-enging shows, but thats ok, hopefully our
scene will perservere enough to get new kids in and maybe
even get the older, jaded kids out.

i'll miss game over, even though we always talk shit on
them and everything, they were still teh legacy and icon of
our scene.

the one line that continues over and over in my head.
Dashboard: "Please send me anything but signals that are
mixed cause i cant read your rolling eyes, out of touch,
are we out of time"

god. this is sad, im sad, i wish everything was as fun as
yesterday, a brusque shock back in to reality isnt doing me
anygood. school sucked today, clint is so never there for
me to talk to. and dont get me started on rich, i told him
about last summer's party with joe and hookin up at
andrew's house, we talked BJs and splurge, weird. ah well,
it was just a moment of awkwardness, all good now.

its hot inside, and im tired. too tired for it being 5pm.
i usualyl dont get home till 6 or so, i was home at 3
today, will didnt drive me home, so i had to take the bus.

heres a toast, to all those who hear me all too well.

one more thing to cry about, fuckin fuck. so i was absent
the day before i had pictures at school, so i didnt knwo
about it and susequently didnt purchase pictuers, but when
i got my school id a few days ago, my pics were so good,
and they havent been this good in a long time, so im sad,
now i dont have pics this year, i may risk it and get
retakes or somthin, but that is sorta lame. ah well fuck it.

left over chinesse food, grr.

yo mr skiles said hes in favor of racial profiling, today.
what hte fuck is wrong with him, jillian and i straight
argued with him for the whole time, fuckin ass hole, first
he says yellow people and obviously targets an african
american kid in school, now this, fuck.

one last thing, so ive been thinking about that boy, herb, (see
previous entry) and kelly kirwin and the randomness of all of it, and
in actualality it isnt, he contacted me, via profile search, flirted,
but i was havin none of his desperate attempts to get with a virgin
15 year old, but obviously, kelly took the bait, so i look at her
weird in english, german and i think shes in my global studies class
too. im not trying to offend her, its just that its a shame to see
her get date *raped* like that. thats all.


thanks for readin j.