DayDream Believer
2001-11-12 17:31:29 (UTC)

New York - Am I crazy or what?

My faborite city, were I havent been yet, but I know I
belong are falling appart and some says its becoming a
dangerus place to live. But stil when pepole come and ask
me if I stil wanna move there I say yes, because its true.
If someone gave me a ticket and said it would not come at
my shcool raport I would go imitiatley!
I cant wait to get there, I have all this picture and books
about New York, but one day Im gonna see it all for
real....that is what is ever left of the city.

Right now Im waiting on my ex`to send me a mail, he have
promissed to do something for me but stil yet he have`nt ,
I hate him for that, all Im waiting for is a stupid mail so
I can start my new life in happiness. Sometimes when he
call I dont answer it, I dont want him to take me for
grunded, and I dont like him that much eather, I know Im
not perfect, but he think he is, and the worse thing is: he
is the most discusting person I know. LOL he`s not over me
yet, one week ago he told me how great Im and how much he
want me back, yeah right, like thats ever gonna happend.

I now it seems silly to say this, but its true, I was never
in love with him, so the reason why we got together? I was
weak, I lost my self for a second, I allmost lot someone
else take controll over me, and use me. It all started lest
easter, when I was stupid enugh to not meet Stian, he did
one thing befor he went home, gave me the date of the day
he was returning, I waited but he didnt call and did`nt
come to chat with me on the internet.
Yeah I know it sems weird, if I wanted to talk to him why
didnt I do it whan he was home so I could see him face to
face, insted waitn til he got back.
So the day when I though he was going home came,but he
wassnt on the chat, I did a lot of stupid and fun things I
never would have done if things where normal, and my ex`is
one of them, the only thing I regret actually.

Love from Angel