Nick's Journal
Ad 2:
2001-11-12 06:46:02 (UTC)

Toilet Paper and Why I don't get the constant bitching.

If you're like me, you're probably not doing much when
you're sitting aroudn in the stall. Today I noticed
something unacceptable. The toilet paper rack is locked
tightly with a deadbolt. Jesus H. Christ......IT'S TOILET
PAPER!!!! Toilet paper does NOT need to be protected by 17
(i counted them) layers of steel. Shit I'm sure if there's
a nuclear holocaust the cockroaches and that toilet paper
rack would be living it up. What are they so afraid of?
That we're gonna t.p. the hall? That we're gonna take some
back with us to our room? That we're going to break free
and finally indulge in our uncontrollable urge to take
rolls of toilet paper and then dress them up in little pink
dresses and serve them tea? And while i'm at bitching
about that, i wanna say something bout the academic
buildings toilet paper. unacceptable. that's the only
word. They're in this black round thing (which i'm sure
you're familiar with) and the toilet paper is about as wide
as my pinky. I swear. i dont' know maybe Ally Mcbeal can
get done with a piece of toilet paper that's as wide as she
is fat, but i would like a bit more room......cos hell i
dont' want to accidentally do what the Indians do every
So yes ironic as it is, i will now bitch about people who
bitch. What is wrong with all of these endorsements for
others? Everywhere i look i see that someone is oppresesd,
that someone is being held back. this isn't fair, you
chose him over me. boo hoo. There are women that bitch
about men in management, there are white, male college
students that bitch about black atheletes, and there
are "under-privileged" minorities who bitch about the
privileged caucasians. Everyone cries about something.
Well, we live in the most open, fair, society you can think
of, and it's only getting better. after sept. 11th we're
scared of losing what we have, and we build on it. name
one other society that's as equitable as this one. oh
sure, i know that it sux for some. i'm not saying that
there is no discrimination, but i AM saying that people
bitch too much about it, and blame their inabilities on
society. it's the beauty of the self-serving principle.
when we do something right it was US. I was the one that
got into this college I am the one that got that good
grade, I'M the reason that I HAVE good life. Vice versa.
It's THEIR fault that i'm not going to college. it's THEIR
fault that i'm "held back". i really love south park, it
makes fun of those people in ways i couldn't even conceive.
in my opinion trey parker and matt stone are just genius.
if it weren't for that show i'd probably write these
journal entries a lot's funny to see that
there are others that can handle this topic with much more
grace and integrity than i can bitch about it.
----the snapping turtle
I watched it hobble across the road in dire need of help.
i felt that i shoudl go out there and help it but i knew
that it's kind didn't want/appreciate help. too much
pride. but i knew he needed my help. as i stood on one
side of the road watching the barreling cars narrowly
missing its already cracked shell, i thought to my
self "what would stevie wonder do?" i knew immediately and
dove through the traffic and swept the creature up in my
hands. i dodged the oncoming traffic and fell on the cool
green grass. the turtle got up and bitch slapped me. it
then proceeded to berate me "you think i need your help?
you just did that to make yourself feel good about your
lack of interest in my turtle friends! sure you thought we
were funny as you watched the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,
but did you ever think about the real us? NO! all you did
was laugh at our antics!!!" i was hurt and just decided to
leave the bickering turtle be, when all of a sudden it
snapped me in the ass. "ha! bet you weren't expecting
that!" so i kicked its cracked ass back.