Love, Sex and College
2001-11-12 04:32:55 (UTC)


It's Sunday night, and I have not written since last
Monday. Well, Monday night I got a phone call from Andrew
from a bar, he talked of wanting a family and that he was
not sure if he could wait for me. We talked about a lot of
things that night. I called him the next night and told him
I had a car available and could come up and see him so we
could talk out our fight some more. He said that he was
going out to dinner with his mom, but would call me when he
got back and if it wasn't too late I would go up there.
Well, no phone call and I worried of course.

The next night I called and told him I had a car again and
I went up and was there at about 9:15 pm. He had told me on
the phone I couldn't be there for long since he had a job
interview. Well, I ended up spending the night. We talked,
I gave him the best blow job of my life. It was truly
erotic. I had talked earlier of wanting to be able to look
at him while I was giving him head. He said that there were
ways. And right there on the couch I did it. He loved it
cause he could truly watch me, it was great. He even had
shaved his balls for me, and he knows I love that. We were
getting ready to go to bed and make love when he discovered
that a water light in the living room had leaked and almost
got onto the entertainment center. This pissed him off and
killed the mood, though I was wanting him so bad. We ended
up just sitting in his room and talking and cuddling. He
has been telling me he has to go find himself. I sat there
with our foreheads touching in the dark and said "maybe the
thing you have been looking for is right in front of you".
He was like, "Oh baby" and held me and I started to cry. I
told him I was not going to tell him I loved him until he
told me he loved me. We talked about our fight and he said
that if he did not care about me he would have not plugged
the phone back in after he un-plugged it after he hung up
on me. If he didn't give a shit he would have just said
fuck it and went to bed. This is very true and I felt
better. He even referred to himself as the "Oxygen-Tank"
which is what my friends Caitlin, Holly and Seanie fondly
refer to my older boyfriend. It was highly cute. He and I
did not get to sleep until like 5 am, where I had to get up
for 7 am and leave by 7:20 am, because I had to drive 40
minutes to get to my 8:15 class. But it was worth it. He
told me that he was going to definetly come up and spend a
couple days with me this weekend. I told him I was going to
my friend Kaci's for the night on Friday but told him to
just show up on Saturday in between 2 and 5.

Saturday rolls around and I fear that he will not show,
which has happened in the past. I got a message on my
machine left on Friday night from him telling me that he
was in Philadelphia for a job interview on Saturday and he
hoped he would be back so he could see me and that he would
call when he got back.

Saturday, I am frantic, I got no call.

Sunday, I went to bed at 2:30 am, just to wake up at 8:30
am from a nightmare about not being able to find him. I am
scared, call his house to see if had gotten back, his
roomate tells me that he had not yet. I get more worried.

Later on Sunday, I get a little pissy and make my friend Jo
take me off campus to get some McDonalds. I get back, still
not call. I hang out watch the rest of Sister Act II which
was on TV, then I take a shower, shave my legs and chill
some more. I then see my RD Jon whose girlfriend had broken
up with him a few days before, we were depressed together
and watched the Simpsons I went back to my room to pee and
get my smokes and lighter (which is Andrew's lighter to be
exact) and went back downstairs, 45 minutes later I go up
to check messages, 2 were from him, he told me that he was
coming back, he was in NY and would be calling me like 15
minutes later. Then he left another message reading to me a
music review of a metal band that he wrote, he told me his
interview went well and he has good news. And told me he
would call me later. Well that was 2 1/2 hours ago, I know
he will be calling soon. I am going to try to borrow Kaci's
car and go pick him up if his brother will not drop him off
here. We shall see. I really want to see him tonight. I
miss him, even though I saw him like 2 days ago. He is my
baby, I love him.

I would like to thank those of you who read my diary, keep
the comments coming, I by accident deleted 2 messages, so
if you didn't get a reply, then send me another message.

Thanks and Goodnight!