Nikkie-chan

Book of the Purple Faerie
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2001-11-10 06:36:17 (UTC)

Lonely like the song says...

Damn, what a freaking BORING start to the weekend!

Day went well enough. My Human Sexuality class was
canceled, postponing the return of our tests another day.
This doesn't disappoint me, because for once I don't think
that I aced this test. Spent the rest of my classes
studying environmental biology for the test that took me 15
minutes to finish... General Hospital= AWESOME! I don't
want Stavros to go yet! He's getting cool! Though I have to
admit that Luke ROCKS! Even if he is old, he is DAMNED
cool!

Michelle never called however. I'm worried about her
because of everything that happened last night. I really,
really want her to understand that all of this is not her
fault, but I don't think that I did a good job... =( I'm
afraid now that my advise and persistent nagging that
things weren't her fault have driven her away and she
doesn't want to talk to me anymore... But maybe I'm just
overreacting. Seems like everyone has been avoiding me
today, though whether true or just circumstancial, you
decide.

Ann came to visit Holly this weekend, driving six hours to
come from Maryland, I think, where she goes to college.
That's nice and all, but Holly said she'd call me for
dinner and I ran into them on the way back from their trip
to the cafeteria. Thanks for that nonexistant phone call,
Holly.

Matt went home for the weekend. Fuck him.

Vanessa invited Jess to a frat party, which Jess turned
down. I'd have gone, but no one ever thinks to ask me.
Thanks everyone.

Shannon got kicked off early tonight =(

Heather was in a bad mood, which seems to be a recent
trend. I wish she was happier... I worry about her. She
thinks that she's going on a date with someone who
irritated her earlier this week. Ah, high school... Dumb,
stupid games that people play with one another. I can't say
that on some level I'm not jealous that Heather gets so
much more attention than I do, but that's just the way it
is. I have moments of pride for who I am, though recently
I've fallen into the line of thinking that I'm going to end
up alone. After all, I can't even keep my friends. How the
heck could I keep a guy? But then I thought, which would be
better: Heather going out with the guy she called a prick
on Thursday or Heather going out with the King? Guess I
ought to be pleased...

Maybe it's time to take another trip to the Rec center to
work off frustration. We'll see if anyone feels like doing
anything tomorrow... I haven't gone there this week except
for swim class. Want to get buff, become thinner, MAYBE
possibly attract a potential mate. I feel strange... I've
been fantasizing about ideal guys again...

Goddess help me.

Nikkie
All by Myself
(also like the song goes)


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