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2001-11-08 10:37:01 (UTC)

He's Okay

He's okay.

My dear precious Jingles. Tiny feet pattering across the
desk. Little nose tucked into my arm while napping.
Always first to offer a hello. Always first to be nearest
the keyboard. The cuddler of cuddlers. The rat of rats.
The biggest of the home bunch.



Why always the ones you hold dearest? Why always the ones
that hold you dearest? They are all loved, but some wiggle
their way into your heart in such a way and are always the
first to go.

We took him to our special place where the two rivers
meet. We took him to the place where we go to pray and
watch the wonder of creation. We took him to the place
where we burn candles on the big rock and contimplate the
issues facing us. We took him to the place God set aside
for us just off the pass.

It was dark and quite, the rivers raging in our ears in
perfect silence. We wept. We lit a candle and used a hoe
and a shovel to bury the tiny creature that had become so
dear to us. Sewn into a crocheted bag and placed in the
earth, he rests beneath the big rock.

I looked out over the river and said, "The rainbow bridge.
I have to believe their is a rainbow bridge. And I know
it's in a place just like this." If there is a rainbow
bridge for rats, then it must have unicorns and fairies and
magic mushrooms. Princes and Princess' and knights in
armor. Castles to explore and forests to retreat to.

The night before I was gripped by unseen grief and had
practiced my secret shame to a personal worst. Now I know
why. My spirit knew and grieved before my flesh became

Lavender Mace

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