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2001-03-21 06:00:36 (UTC)

the first of my life s journey..

the first of my life's journey scribed in stone(this
computer). For once, i dont leave my mark on the blind
society with grafitti, i do this for my lone ranger, you
know who u are. Life as i know began with nothing, as
the "people" would call it. But i think, i visualize i do
have more than i need even though it seems not so. I had
control, all i needed. All my life, i felt it, the switch
was in me. I was the controller...Then all of a sudden,
all at once, i lost control. The life as "i" went blind, i
fell into the hole of hell. This earth here is the
ultimate torture for the weak, and so was i? What happens
now? I realize, told myself, i knew, i am not weak.I began
to question, seek, and destroy... destroy what was clouding
my thoughts, my true self. I, "peter" ... there is
no "i"... you are always in constant change,
metaphysically, spiritually... enegies collide and combust,
and thus i am reborn...What about death? How can u say
that if there is death? Well...death is the truth my
YOUR EYE...and when became aquainted with death and its
power... it nearly trapped me, i believed in it, a state of
nothingness? i asked. Then the voice traveled, not said,
to my body...i beleieve, death is when u are truly
awake...7:55 on Marh 18 2001 at the age of 63, when my
father awoke, yet he laid lifeless in bed. My eyes saw him
as lifeless, but was he really? No, ofcourse not, hes in a
better place, he has evolved... the spirit lives on... I
know he is still on and tell me what u
think... when im home, i could here him knock, this is how
he communicates, he knocks at my aunts house... I can feel
the presence...when my little neice was with my sister, my
sister walked by the room he used to sleep in at my aunts
house, she was playing with my neice, my neice was
laughing.. going by the room, my neice suddenly froze,
looking into the room, i have no idea at what, but she
began to grab a hold to my sisters neck in fear crying,
looking, looking, looking... who was it? i wanted to
ask..but i knew she would not answer...and in the prayer,
in the middle of the chant, i decided to open my eyes to
see what was going on, i had weird vibes, so i peeked...the
two candles that were lit, began to move abnormally, there
was no wind, hey began to move and jump over the place,
like fireworks... i have no idea if nobody else
noticed...what was it? My sister also had a dream on
friday, and my mom, my aunt, my brother...all about
him...The dream was that he came and told them "Im going
now".... That is why i believe he left on friday, besides,
the doctor said that some people pass away but he body
still "acts", this case, it mite of happened, the
respirator mite of helped... but i ask my self"why didnt he
come to me?" i am yet again a puzzled entity...y?why? so i
prayed for him, what is keeping me away from him? or is it
the other way around? Question MY reality...i go nuts, the
mind boggles, i ome to a conclusion... my conclusion, there
is none... but this, there's a purpose to me not knowing...
and i know its the whole life, i lived to ask
questions, but i realized, i now must live to seek
answers...i came to see that i like who i am, not who i am
not... i became a "seer"... i like that babe, one who iews
and questions, seeking for the
AMBRISS, is he truy HEAR? live in peace...well well
well... i dunno what else my mind can scribe, so imma end
it... this is a peice of mind from peter, for u, i hope it
helps.. I LIVE to do what i love to do, its not anything
about what i do for a living...rmemeber, happiness is
around you, open your eyes and see past all you.......PETEROCKus march
somethin 2001(wish the world away)

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